The Green Police: Fact or Fiction?

I’ll confess that I didn’t completely respect Mark Dice’s appeal to boycott the Superbowl and during the few minutes I tuned in this commercial aired. It’s supposed to be humorous, but are the “Green Police” really so far from being a reality?


Majestic is gadfly emeritus.

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12 Comments on "The Green Police: Fact or Fiction?"

  1. catjungle | Feb 8, 2010 at 8:57 am |

    Um, yes.

  2. conniedobbs | Feb 8, 2010 at 11:08 am |

    adorable. I can't wait!

  3. I was disturbed by the commercial. Here I am, sitting and watching the Super Bowl as much for the commercials as the game and this supposedly funny commercial comes on. When it was over, I realized how horrible it would be to live in that world. The impending reality is frightening. It was too real. It could happen. There is nothing absurd about the Green Police.

    I agree we should recycle and watch our plastic use but then what else “should” we do? In South Korea I know they require people to recycle and those who don't are subject to fines. What other countries do this? Am I taking this too seriously?

    • Sam Seed, what would you do if some people refused to do any recycling, and thereby caused the price of all the commodities involved to be more expensive for everyone? Is that fair? How do you propose to solve that? What about landfill space – the quicker that fills up, the more expensive garbage becomes. I doubt it would be required to resort to draconian measures.

      I haven't seen the ad, but I am betting good money this is a republican ad designed to make any green movement (and Democrats) sound bad. Thanks fools, we're having enough problems as it is, we don't need any more crap. We don't need any more thoughtless bullshit, could we stick to things that are actually real?

      In theory we have a “green police” here in that the city can inspect garbage and fine if they contain stuff in the blue box. In practice, they don't.

      • Maybe things should be more expensive. This throw-away culture is cheap up front but incurs all these invisible costs, such as pollution, poverty, and human suffering. Corporations should be held responsible for producing environmentally-friendly and practically-garbage free packaging. Then with things more expensive people would be a little more thoughtful about what they really need.

        Garbage companies should start requiring recycling of their own volition. Or cities create ordinances to require them to. Think of all the extra fees they could charge to those who violate the recycling requirements. Maybe this isn't happening because recycling isn't that desirable in a profitable way yet. I don't know all the economics of recycling.

        I wish you would have watched the commercial before your reply. Do republicans control VW?

    • “I realized how horrible it would be to live in that world. The impending reality is frightening. It was too real. It could happen. There is nothing absurd about the Green Police.”

      But there is whole bunches that's absurd about your over-the-top reaction to it.

      I say if it bounces white guys with afros out of hot tubs, it's doing the species a service.

      There are plenty of things to be concerned about when it comes to abuse of police powers – things like the casual use of so-called “non-lethal” weapons, the use of oxymoronic “free speech zones”, the insane prevalence of surveillance cameras, or the privatization of policing through things like Infragard come to mind.

      But having somebody encourage a community to recycle???? This is not on sane people's worry list.

      You want to worry about something related to green issues? Worry about the fact that one man owns the largest water aquifer in the entire state of Texas, or that 4/5ths of all the species on earth are now endangered, or that a chunk of ice the size of Rhode Island has snapped off of Antarctica. THOSE are things to worry about.

      • “a chunk of ice the size of Rhode Island has snapped off of Antarctica.”

        That was sea-ice. It's Summer down there at the moment. That ice is ephemeral: it's grows in the Winter and breaks off in the Summer. It melting does not increase sea-level one iota since it is already displacing water commensurate with its mass. Antarctic sea-ice has been at record extent the past few years. Your brainwashed feeble mind has interpreted a natural annual event that has no effect on anything as some sort of disaster. You haven't got a clue. Please educate yourself before commenting so you don't embarrass yourself and confuse people who you deceive into thinking that you have the first clue what you're talking about.

        “But having somebody encourage a community to recycle???? This is not on sane people's worry list.”

        Stay the fuck out of my recycling bin and my business you clueless totalitarian.

    • america should do what S.Korea does when it comes to recycling. i have lived in texas 24 years and not once did i ever see a person recycle but now that i live in california i've noticed that it is a common thing. i like it 🙂

  4. SecretSteve | Feb 8, 2010 at 2:27 pm |

    Just to play devil's advotcate here…I think the Green Police will one day be absolutely necesary to the survival of the species. Oh, and first of all, in my town you can already be fined for putting too many recyclables or compostables in your garbage. It's enforced by the garbage collectors, though, not a separate police force.

    But one day I honestly believe it will be necessary not just to have green police, but a green army to protect the natural resources the world requires to support life. We will one day likely reach the point where we need to defend the remaining forests from destruction…just to ensure that the earth can generate enough oxygen for us to breathe. And even more likely…and likely to happen sooner…will be the defense of viable fisheries from foreign fishing fleets. Should worldwide fisheries continue to decline, and if climate change causes crops to fail it will literally take sinking some fishing boats to keep them out of our waters to protect species of fish we catch for food. The only alternative will be the destruction of the few healthy fisheries that remain and one more source of food.

    But I don't think we'll ever see armed police telling us to recycle. For one thing, voluntary recycling regimes have been very effective, and the marginal improvement in recycling rates you'd get from enforcement wouldn't be cost-effective.

    Then maybe Sea Shepard can get them some REAL guns.

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