A To Z Of Sexual History: W = Wet Dream

From VICE:

A wet dream is basically a freebie: a gift from the orgasm fairy. After all, what could be better than waking up in the night from the sheer force of ejaculation? However, in earlier eras, rather than being the sexual equivalent of a surprise party, they were considered the work of the devil, who squeezed out your semen in a fight for your soul.

There is a Sin Scale, with gangbanging grannies somewhere near the top, and having the occasional wank in the more forgivable spectrum. However, religious folk have always struggled to know where to place the wet dream; there is no act of volition and they are seemingly random. The majority of times I have woken cumming in my sleep I don’t even remember what I was dreaming about, so wouldn’t take kindly to being held responsible for whatever cornucopia of filth was in my sleeping head.

Nonetheless, the hands-free orgasm was often seen as a sign of moral laxity. John Cassian, a 5th century monk, described them as “a sign of some sickness hidden inside… it exposes the hidden fibres of the agitations that we have collected by feasting on harmful thoughts all day long.” An allowance of a thrice-annual emission was given to men, but any more than that would mean you were basically sucking off the devil every night. Demons—who were angels fallen from heaven with the weight of their lust—were blamed for wet dreams. They seduced you in your sleep because, like drunk girls, that’s when you put up least resistance. An incubus is a male demon who “lies upon” girls, and a succubus is the female equivalent who “lies beneath” men. Women were most prone to demon molestation as they were feeble of will and mind, and it was often used as an excuse for “unexplainable” pregnancies. The monks struggled to account for how a demon, being non-human, could impregnate a girl. They came up with this dizzying theory: as demons are transsexual (!) they would take the form of a succubus to collect semen from men during their wet dream, after which they would turn into an incubus and use the stolen sperm to impregnate women. Demons were also blamed for nuns’ penchant for hanky-spanky…

[continues at VICE]

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  • justagirl

    sister of the morning wood fairy? the much prettier sister perhaps?

    • GoodDoktorBad

      …..consult with your “inner hag” for answers……..

      Smooooches!!

      • justagirl

        stop answering rhetorical questions….

        HASSAN CHOP!!

        • GoodDoktorBad

          Yer funny…..

  • tonyviner

    I actually woke up in the midst of an attack by the Orgasm Fairy, he's a real person. It wasn't pleasant.

  • GoodDoktorBad

    Somebody left a squirt-bottle full of mayonnaise in my bed…….

  • lg wet patch

    The best sex possible imo is sleepy sex. maybe excludng with mary jane

  • oman28

    A freebie from the orgasm fairy? Hardly
    It's more like you slept through a really good party only to wake up, everyones gone and there's a big mess to clean up

  • Cerebralsubversion

    “They came up with this dizzying theory: as demons are transsexual (!) they would take the form of a succubus to collect semen from men during their wet dream, after which they would turn into an incubus and use the stolen sperm to impregnate women. Demons were also blamed for nuns’ penchant for hanky-spanky…”

    Ugh,

    Yeah, but people do in fact have Incubus/Succubus experiences in the sleep paralysis state, which is the precursor to astral projection (something that no one in western society wants to know anything about because it challenges their narrow materialist perspectives). I've had them, although I've never had a wet dream. So saying that this is some crazy idea about wet dreams, ignores the fact that this crazy idea is based on actual experiences that people, including myself have had, wherein they find themselves awake in the sleep paralysis state with some kind of astral entity molesting them. So what is going on there, exactly? Why have so many people reported such simliar experiences over the years. Nevermind, if we call them “crazy” we don't have to think about it, and therefore it doesn't “exist”.

  • Zoe_Brain

    A minority of Intersexed people get a “natural sex change”, almost always from female to male. I over-simplify, and not everyone with either 5ARD or 17BHDD syndromes has this happen to them, but yes, it happens. It can induce or cure transsexuality in the process.

    See for example:
    http://www.usrf.org/news/010308-guevedoces.html
    http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/meast/12/17/gaza.gender.id/

    There’s plenty of religious nutters around who claim that these people are “spawn of the Devil” and so on. Some take violent action against them based on that idea.

  • Zoe_Brain

    A minority of Intersexed people get a “natural sex change”, almost always from female to male. I over-simplify, and not everyone with either 5ARD or 17BHDD syndromes has this happen to them, but yes, it happens. It can induce or cure transsexuality in the process.

    See for example:
    http://www.usrf.org/news/010308-guevedoces.html
    http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/meast/12/17/g

    There's plenty of religious nutters around who claim that these people are “spawn of the Devil” and so on. Some take violent action against them based on that idea.