U.S. Warns Of Zombie Apocalypse

Hard to believe that this is a real communication from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control, but it is! From the official CDC blog:

There are all kinds of emergencies out there that we can prepare for. Take a zombie apocalypse for example. That’s right, I said z-o-m-b-i-e a-p-o-c-a-l-y-p-s-e. You may laugh now, but when it happens you’ll be happy you read this, and hey, maybe you’ll even learn a thing or two about how to prepare for a real emergency.

A Brief History of Zombies

We’ve all seen at least one movie about flesh-eating zombies taking over (my personal favorite is Resident Evil), but where do zombies come from and why do they love eating brains so much? The word zombie comes from Haitian and New Orleans voodoo origins. Although its meaning has changed slightly over the years, it refers to a human corpse mysteriously reanimated to serve the undead. Through ancient voodoo and folk-lore traditions, shows like the Walking Dead were born.

In movies, shows, and literature, zombies are often depicted as being created by an infectious virus, which is passed on via bites and contact with bodily fluids. Harvard psychiatrist Steven Schoolman wrote a (fictional) medical paper on the zombies presented in Night of the Living Dead and refers to the condition as Ataxic Neurodegenerative Satiety Deficiency Syndrome caused by an infectious agent. The Zombie Survival Guide identifies the cause of zombies as a virus called solanum. Other zombie origins shown in films include radiation from a destroyedNASA Venus probe (as in Night of the Living Dead), as well as mutations of existing conditions such as prionsmad-cow diseasemeasles and rabies.

The rise of zombies in pop culture has given credence to the idea that a zombie apocalypse could happen. In such a scenario zombies would take over entire countries, roaming city streets eating anything living that got in their way. The proliferation of this idea has led many people to wonder “How do I prepare for a zombie apocalypse?”

Well, we’re here to answer that question for you, and hopefully share a few tips about preparing for real emergencies too!

[continues at the official CDC blog]

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  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1416305968 Robbie Bergulson

    where the fuck is the rest of the article?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1416305968 Robbie Bergulson

    where the fuck is the rest of the article?

    • Markov Cheney

      hmm.. I dunno.. maybe at the link contained in the text: “[continues at the official CDC blog]” 

      I’m just guessing though 

      • justagirl

         zombies be using the internet.

  • http://www.facebook.com/WispersinWind Jean Marie Dintaman

    Yeah where is the rest how do we prevent ourselves from infetion besides don’t get bit or body fluids in ya. What else?
     

  • http://www.facebook.com/WispersinWind Jean Marie Dintaman

    Yeah where is the rest how do we prevent ourselves from infetion besides don’t get bit or body fluids in ya. What else?
     

  • http://twitter.com/ohscalco m.e. scalco

    put it in really simple terms will ya. something th people can get their collective (mob) minds (BRAINS) around..

  • http://twitter.com/ohscalco m.e. scalco

    put it in really simple terms will ya. something th people can get their collective (mob) minds (BRAINS) around..

  • Bachrodi

    Resident Evil is/was a game… not a movie. 

  • Bachrodi

    Resident Evil is/was a game… not a movie. 

    • Umbrella Corp.

      it is/ was also a movie. A shit one.

    • MrPINKi

      Uh its both actually. 

    • Frank Zermeno

      You sir are a moron.

      • CRYSTILSTARR

        I THINK THIS WHOLE SITE ABOUT ZOMBIES IS MORONIC JUST LIKE THE SIMPLE PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY BELIEVE THAT THIS SHIT COULD REALLY HAPPEN!

        • guest

          I think your caps lock is broken.

  • Umbrella Corp.

    it is/ was also a movie. A shit one.

  • E.B. Wolf

     Zombie Apocalypse: Chances are, you’re already surrounded by mindless, bloodthirsty, half-alive, subhuman wretches. An actual zombie outbreak would just give you an excuse to do something constructive.

  • E.B. Wolf

     Zombie Apocalypse: Chances are, you’re already surrounded by mindless, bloodthirsty, half-alive, subhuman wretches. An actual zombie outbreak would just give you an excuse to do something constructive.

    • http://hormeticminds.blogspot.com/ Chaorder Gradient

      More people need to watch Ugly Americans.

      • E.B. Wolf

        People watch more than enough TV as is. 

        • Butter Knife

          But if they were watching the right TV, which is to say, the TV that I like, it wouldn’t be a problem, because they would be watching TV which is thought-provoking and intellectually stimulating.

          Surely you see the obvious righteousness of this premise.

          [/sarcasm]

  • Anonymous

     Well it makes sense. If you can handle a zombie apocalypse, you can handle just about anything. Just another reason to stock up in your shelters.

  • SF2K01

     Well it makes sense. If you can handle a zombie apocalypse, you can handle just about anything. Just another reason to stock up in your shelters.

  • Markov Cheney

    hmm.. I dunno.. maybe at the link contained in the text: “[continues at the official CDC blog]” 

    I’m just guessing though 

  • justagirl

     zombies be using the internet.

  • justagirl

    zombie survival kit should include wood, hammer, nails and shotgun.  wtf?

  • justagirl

    zombie survival kit should include wood, hammer, nails and shotgun.  wtf?

  • Zombiefreeworld

    whoever wrote this article is a complete noob. he has no idea what zombies are about and is going to mislead and give disinformation to a lot of people…www.zombiefreeworld.com

  • Zombiefreeworld

    whoever wrote this article is a complete noob. he has no idea what zombies are about and is going to mislead and give disinformation to a lot of people…www.zombiefreeworld.com

  • Anonymous

    “your source for credible health information!”

  • MoralDrift

    “your source for credible health information!”

  • cesium 137

    we’ll all be mutants soon if the Japanese can’t fix their fucking reactors!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • cesium 137

    we’ll all be mutants soon if the Japanese can’t fix their fucking reactors!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • http://hormeticminds.blogspot.com/ Chaorder Gradient

    More people need to watch Ugly Americans.

  • E.B. Wolf

    People watch more than enough TV as is. 

  • Anonymous

    Uh its both actually. 

  • http://twitter.com/RicKats Rick Kats

    check out some cool judgment day tshirts on stillherethanks.com

  • Wadejanes

    it seems to me that all the zombies are going to starve because every-one’s lost their mind’s if they believe this garbage !!! 

  • Wadejanes

    it seems to me that all the zombies are going to starve because every-one’s lost their mind’s if they believe this garbage !!! 

  • DeepCough

    I always knew that the “Zombie Survival Guide” was an invaluable tool.

  • DeepCough

    I always knew that the “Zombie Survival Guide” was an invaluable tool.

  • chubby

    The real zombie apocalypse that can happen (how are those dreams coming along?) will with all likelihood be caused by siege wars in the future against overpopulated nations whose lands cannot sustain them, forcing the inhabitants to cannibalism….

  • chubby

    The real zombie apocalypse that can happen (how are those dreams coming along?) will with all likelihood be caused by siege wars in the future against overpopulated nations whose lands cannot sustain them, forcing the inhabitants to cannibalism….

  • Madmacks23

    the “ministry of zombies,the official zombie handbook (uk)” another usefull guide.
    and before any one has a rant i dont actualy belive in the actual dead coming to life, but it is a good guide for when society finally does collapse. (it’s taking it’s time) 

  • Madmacks23

    the “ministry of zombies,the official zombie handbook (uk)” another usefull guide.
    and before any one has a rant i dont actualy belive in the actual dead coming to life, but it is a good guide for when society finally does collapse. (it’s taking it’s time) 

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=654690606 Hikari Baryonyx Poon

    Even if a zombie apocalypse happens, it’s not like the zombies will go anywhere. Natural predators are everywhere- animals looking for a bite to eat, bacteria (which grows exponentially under heat & moisture.. hey, look at our climate! Especially during the summertime.), humans (and our weapons. We’re not top of the food chain for no reason.), insects (maggots! eww!) and a whole lot of other reasons. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=654690606 Hikari Baryonyx Poon

    Even if a zombie apocalypse happens, it’s not like the zombies will go anywhere. Natural predators are everywhere- animals looking for a bite to eat, bacteria (which grows exponentially under heat & moisture.. hey, look at our climate! Especially during the summertime.), humans (and our weapons. We’re not top of the food chain for no reason.), insects (maggots! eww!) and a whole lot of other reasons. 

  • Frank Zermeno

    You sir are a moron.

  • CRYSTILSTARR

    I THINK THIS WHOLE SITE ABOUT ZOMBIES IS MORONIC JUST LIKE THE SIMPLE PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY BELIEVE THAT THIS SHIT COULD REALLY HAPPEN!

  • http://www.facebook.com/silverseuss Silvia Velarde

    aim for the head~

  • http://www.facebook.com/silverseuss Silvia Velarde

    aim for the head~

  • Ddnlj

    It’s a creative public service ad for the CDC on emergency preparedness, you idiot. It’s not about REAL zombie attacks.  

  • Ddnlj

    It’s a creative public service ad for the CDC on emergency preparedness, you idiot. It’s not about REAL zombie attacks.  

  • Butter Knife

    But if they were watching the right TV, which is to say, the TV that I like, it wouldn’t be a problem, because they would be watching TV which is thought-provoking and intellectually stimulating.

    Surely you see the obvious righteousness of this premise.

    [/sarcasm]

  • guest

    I think your caps lock is broken.

  • guest

    I think your caps lock is broken.

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