Texas Teen Held After Vampire Attack

thumb-Lyle Monroe BensleyAre vampire portrayals in popular media blurring driving today’s youth over the edge? Personally, I’ll take teen vampirism over “raving”, “krumping”, or “the ska revival”. The Houston Chronicle writes:

A man claiming to be a 500-year-old vampire was in the Galveston County jail today after attacking a woman over the weekend. “He was begging us to restrain him because he didn’t want to kill us,” Galveston Officer Daniel Erickson said. “He said he needed to feed.”

Lyle Monroe Bensley, 19, covered with tattoos and wearing only boxer shorts, forced his way into the apartment on Seawall Boulevard and made his way into the bedroom of a woman whose name has not been released, Heyse said.

Bensley made growling and hissing noises while biting and hitting the woman in her bed, Heyse said. Bensley then dragged her out of the apartment and she broke free. She ran into the parking lot where she got into a car driven by a neighbor. Bensley beat on the car before it sped away, Heyse said.

66 Comments on "Texas Teen Held After Vampire Attack"

  1. Rex Vestri | Aug 26, 2011 at 5:56 pm |

    This, folks, is what happens when kids eat lead paint chips off the window sill and drink infant formula made with fluoridated water.

  2. Rex Vestri | Aug 26, 2011 at 1:56 pm |

    This, folks, is what happens when kids eat lead paint chips off the window sill and drink infant formula made with fluoridated water.

  3. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 5:57 pm |

    I thought modern Vampires foreclosed on banks.

    Son I am disappoint.

  4. I thought modern Vampires foreclosed on banks.

    Son I am disappoint.

    • That’s only the Ventrue. And sometimes maybe the Giovanni…

      Wonder what he did when the sun came up and shone into the jail.

      • Butter Knife | Aug 28, 2011 at 6:46 pm |

        Modern vampires don’t include the Giovanni, because White Wolf is firmly committed to sucking.

        • I meant the Vampire that foreclosed on the Bank of America branch, but whatever white wolf is thats cool too.

        • Don’t they? *sigh* I dunno. I picked up the early books in the new version and then promptly put them back down again. Much prefer 2nd ed.

      • Butter Knife | Aug 28, 2011 at 6:46 pm |

        Modern vampires don’t include the Giovanni, because White Wolf is firmly committed to sucking.

      • Butter Knife | Aug 28, 2011 at 6:46 pm |

        Modern vampires don’t include the Giovanni, because White Wolf is firmly committed to sucking.

  5. Butter Knife | Aug 26, 2011 at 6:33 pm |

    Remember kids: meth is BAD.

  6. Butter Knife | Aug 26, 2011 at 2:33 pm |

    Remember kids: meth is BAD.

  7. Big surprise. Anyone who wears those fucking earrings = asshole.

  8. wondering if it was daylight?

  9. mole_face | Aug 26, 2011 at 2:42 pm |

    Big surprise. Anyone who wears those fucking earrings = asshole.

  10. wondering if it was daylight?

  11. DeepCough | Aug 26, 2011 at 7:46 pm |

    Okay, people are taking “True Blood” and “Twilight” way too fucking seriously.

  12. DeepCough | Aug 26, 2011 at 3:46 pm |

    Okay, people are taking “True Blood” and “Twilight” way too fucking seriously.

  13. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:25 pm |

    To be fair, if the kid is a product of Texas public schools, he honestly has no way of knowing that vampires aren’t literally real.  Or goblins, minotaurs, tooth fairies…

  14. To be fair, if the kid is a product of Texas public schools, he honestly has no way of knowing that vampires aren’t literally real.  Or goblins, minotaurs, tooth fairies…

  15. justagirl | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:28 pm |

    don’t you guys communicate in there?  or… read your own news?  lol.

  16. justagirl | Aug 26, 2011 at 4:28 pm |

    don’t you guys communicate in there?  or… read your own news?  lol.

  17. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:37 pm |

    This sounds less like a case of vampire-mania and more like a case of drug abuse or psychiatric disorder.

  18. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:37 pm |

    This sounds less like a case of vampire-mania and more like a case of drug abuse or psychiatric disorder.

  19. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:37 pm |

    This sounds less like a case of vampire-mania and more like a case of drug abuse or psychiatric disorder.

  20. This sounds less like a case of vampire-mania and more like a case of drug abuse or psychiatric disorder.

    • That’s only the Ventrue. And sometimes maybe the Giovanni…

      Wonder what he did when the sun came up and shone into the jail.

  21. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:52 pm |

    That’s only the Ventrue. And sometimes maybe the Giovanni…

    Wonder what he did when the sun came up and shone into the jail.

  22. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:52 pm |

    That’s only the Ventrue. And sometimes maybe the Giovanni…

    Wonder what he did when the sun came up and shone into the jail.

  23. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:57 pm |

    His lawyer’s saying he ingested rohypnol at a party: http://galvestondailynews.com/story/251918

    To me it sounds more like maybe he got some acid but hey, I wasn’t there.

    from the article:
    “He remembers being at the party, he blacks out and about 12 hours later
    he wakes up in jail,” Brown said. “He doesn’t remember anything that
    happened … Imagine the shock when he saw it on the news and learned
    what happened.”

    Bensley has no affinity for vampires and doesn’t claim to be one, Brown said.

    Bensley, a single father, had a steady job as a contractor and is a tattoo artist, Brown said.

    “He’s absolutely devastated with what happened to the poor lady,” Brown said.

    Police
    didn’t test Bensley for drugs or alcohol. Such tests are reserved only
    for those charged with intoxication offenses, Heyse said.

    Damnit, someone claims he’s a vampire and you don’t think maybe he should be _tested for drugs_? What the hell were the cops thinking? Whether he took them himself or was given them without his knowledge, shouldn’t that test be the _first_ thing they did, followed by holding for psychiatric evaluation?

  24. His lawyer’s saying he ingested rohypnol at a party: http://galvestondailynews.com/story/251918

    To me it sounds more like maybe he got some acid but hey, I wasn’t there.

    from the article:
    “He remembers being at the party, he blacks out and about 12 hours later
    he wakes up in jail,” Brown said. “He doesn’t remember anything that
    happened … Imagine the shock when he saw it on the news and learned
    what happened.”

    Bensley has no affinity for vampires and doesn’t claim to be one, Brown said.

    Bensley, a single father, had a steady job as a contractor and is a tattoo artist, Brown said.

    “He’s absolutely devastated with what happened to the poor lady,” Brown said.

    Police
    didn’t test Bensley for drugs or alcohol. Such tests are reserved only
    for those charged with intoxication offenses, Heyse said.

    Damnit, someone claims he’s a vampire and you don’t think maybe he should be _tested for drugs_? What the hell were the cops thinking? Whether he took them himself or was given them without his knowledge, shouldn’t that test be the _first_ thing they did, followed by holding for psychiatric evaluation?

    • Rex Vestri | Aug 27, 2011 at 10:11 am |

      But these are cops we’re dealing with here. 99% of cops are basically dimwit idiots, so all in all they performed just about how you’d expect them to. We shouldn’t expect them to do what is logical, makes sense, or is right…they’re cops.

  25. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:58 pm |

    That’s only the Ventrue. And sometimes maybe the Giovanni…

    Wonder what he did when the sun came up and shone into the jail.

  26. Anonymous | Aug 26, 2011 at 8:59 pm |

    bah. Can’t delete my post. That was a reply to Suddenly Spam, not you. Sorry.

  27. Rex Vestri | Aug 26, 2011 at 9:01 pm |

    I know, right.  

    Thanks Rick Perry!

  28. I’m more worried about the ska revival?!  For fuck sake not this shit again..

  29. I’m more worried about the ska revival?!  For fuck sake not this shit again..

  30. I’m more worried about the ska revival?!  For fuck sake not this shit again..

  31. The “portrayal of modern vampires” probably has little effect in this instance. People like thisARE NOT MENTALLY STABLE. Even if vampires were banned, even if he did not know of their existence, idiots like this would just find something else retarded to latch on to. 

  32. bobbiethejean | Aug 26, 2011 at 7:47 pm |

    The “portrayal of modern vampires” probably has little effect in this instance. People like thisARE NOT MENTALLY STABLE. Even if vampires were banned, even if he did not know of their existence, idiots like this would just find something else retarded to latch on to. 

  33. no fake vampire teeth? this dood is an amateur 

  34. no fake vampire teeth? this dood is an amateur 

  35. one too many twilight movies there buddy

  36. one too many twilight movies there buddy

  37. one too many twilight movies there buddy

  38. Argosyjones | Aug 27, 2011 at 3:23 am |

    Drive a stake through his heart.  If he stays dead, he’s a vampire.

  39. Argosyjones | Aug 26, 2011 at 11:23 pm |

    Drive a stake through his heart.  If he stays dead, he’s a vampire.

  40. But you do know that trolls are very real 

  41. Rex Vestri | Aug 27, 2011 at 2:11 pm |

    But these are cops we’re dealing with here. 99% of cops are basically dimwit idiots, so all in all they performed just about how you’d expect them to.

  42. Blackout followed by intense remorse sounds like textbook alcoholism.  Did something he would never do in his right mind?  Check.  Case closed.  Get this kid some help.  Or better yet, quit enabling his ass by giving him scapegoats to hide underneath.  Hopefully that woman sues his ASS… sooner there are consequences, the better.

  43. Blackout followed by intense remorse sounds like textbook alcoholism.  Did something he would never do in his right mind?  Check.  Case closed.  Get this kid some help.  Or better yet, quit enabling his ass by giving him scapegoats to hide underneath.  Hopefully that woman sues his ASS… sooner there are consequences, the better.

  44. Blackout followed by intense remorse sounds like textbook alcoholism.  Did something he would never do in his right mind?  Check.  Case closed.  Get this kid some help.  Or better yet, quit enabling his ass by giving him scapegoats to hide underneath.  Hopefully that woman sues his ASS… sooner there are consequences, the better.

  45. Blackout followed by intense remorse sounds like textbook alcoholism.  Did something he would never do in his right mind?  Check.  Case closed.  Get this kid some help.  Or better yet, quit enabling his ass by giving him scapegoats to hide underneath.  Hopefully that woman sues his ASS… sooner there are consequences, the better.

  46. Butter Knife | Aug 28, 2011 at 10:46 pm |

    Modern vampires don’t include the Giovanni, because White Wolf is firmly committed to sucking.

  47. Vikingdrummer | Aug 28, 2011 at 11:09 pm |

    Well…

    At least he can plead temporary insanity. If he can afford a decent lawyer, he’ll pay a fine, time served, community service, drug screens & probation….

  48. Vikingdrummer | Aug 28, 2011 at 7:09 pm |

    Well…

    At least he can plead temporary insanity. If he can afford a decent lawyer, he’ll pay a fine, time served, community service, drug screens & probation….

  49. Vikingdrummer | Aug 28, 2011 at 7:09 pm |

    Well…

    At least he can plead temporary insanity. If he can afford a decent lawyer, he’ll pay a fine, time served, community service, drug screens & probation….

  50. Vikingdrummer | Aug 28, 2011 at 7:09 pm |

    Well…

    At least he can plead temporary insanity. If he can afford a decent lawyer, he’ll pay a fine, time served, community service, drug screens & probation….

  51. Anonymous | Aug 29, 2011 at 1:38 am |

    I meant the Vampire that foreclosed on the Bank of America branch, but whatever white wolf is thats cool too.

  52. Anonymous | Aug 29, 2011 at 2:19 pm |

    Don’t they? *sigh* I dunno. I picked up the early books in the new version and then promptly put them back down again. Much prefer 2nd ed.

  53. Patrick Rogers? I think that was Wells Fargo.

  54. Anonymous | Nov 17, 2011 at 9:47 am |

    And…. 2 months later I see your reply.

    You are indeed correct.

Comments are closed.