President Pardons Thanksgiving Turkey; Murders U.S. Citizen Without Trial

By on November 23, 2011 in News 20

Talk about your empty gestures. For seriously now, Eli, how do you expect to retain your own credibility after tolerating shenannigans like this?

More heedless heresy, from the usual suspects at: Dystopia Diaries

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  • Anonymous

    The turkey committed no crime to begin with, so the gesture is doubly empty. Laugh it up…..

  • Anonymous

    The turkey committed no crime to begin with, so the gesture is doubly empty. Laugh it up…..

  • Anarchy Pony

    True enough. Absolutely pathetic. But being a non human organism, it’s crime is daring to be alive.

  • Anarchy Pony

    True enough. Absolutely pathetic. But being a non human organism, it’s crime is daring to be alive.

  • Anonymous

    It’s crime is being delicious….

  • Anonymous

    Mmmm Turkey…. *insert image of Homer Simpson here*

  • Mysophobe

    If Ben Franklin had had his way, the fierce American wild turkey would be our protected national symbol instead of the cowardly bald eagle. Mmm, oven roasted bald eagle with gravy and stuffing… Also, assassinating American citizens without a court trial should be illegal. What’s that, It’s already illegal? Huh. I guess we now have to try two administrations for war crimes, if and when we ever regain our sanity.

  • Anonymous

    You lot had better stay away from my cat.

  • Anonymous

    Turkey tastes like shit anyway.

  • Anarchy Pony

    Blasphemy!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=773433966 Rus Archer

    they named the turkey liberty&peace?
    and they’ll kill and eat it?if that’s not symbolic…

  • akbar

    nothing warms my heart quite like nervous fake laughter…god bless america…

  • 5by5

    A “tradition” this stupid could only have been “invented” by George Bush Sr. But it’s even stupider to repeat it.

  • Jin Onikoroshi

    only really traditional chinese and mongolian people eat “tiger” so i think you’ll be safe:p

  • Honu

    How do you know what shit tastes like?

  • Anonymous

    I imagine its something like how you smell.

  • Anonymous

    Chinese people are so tiny that a housecat must look like a Tiger.

    Oh yeah, I went there.

  • Jin Onikoroshi

    lol s’ok. i give u a free pass. but next time you’ll taste the raw power of my chinese gongfu….

  • Rodneypopper

    Gobble without saying anything?… Sounds like the President!
    And to call these future dead things “Liberty & Peace” is like calling Americans Libertarian and Peaceful!
    Ha!  Liberty and peace in america are as dead as the 2 birds! The way the 2 young girls touched the bird was the way they would touch an Afghan detainee… EEEW!
    America is dead and someone has to admit it!

  • Cha-Ching!

    Oh shit bro!!!!!!!!