The Jesus Toaster Makes Food Miracles

Every believer has seen the videos of the Virgin Mary appearing in the form of a Cheeto or a linen stain and secretly hopes for an uncanny sign that will validate their faith — that’s why the Jesus Toaster is the perfect Christmas gift. Now anyone can have the rapturous joy of witnessing the Lord appear in their morning toast:

toaster

21 Comments on "The Jesus Toaster Makes Food Miracles"

  1. Gregory Wyrdmaven | Dec 22, 2011 at 1:28 pm |

    I love how these Xians take their faith so seriously.

  2. Gregory Wyrdmaven | Dec 22, 2011 at 9:28 am |

    I love how these Xians take their faith so seriously.

  3. DeepCough | Dec 22, 2011 at 3:31 pm |

    This is America: I like my Communion wine cold and my Host (bread) toasted.

  4. DeepCough | Dec 22, 2011 at 11:31 am |

    This is America: I like my Communion wine cold and my Host (bread) toasted.

  5. Oh, I just love melted butter and peanut butter on toast. 

  6. Oh, I just love melted butter and peanut butter on toast. 

  7. These are humor. Same company makes ‘peace’ toasters and ‘pot leaf’ toasters.

  8. These are humor. Same company makes ‘peace’ toasters and ‘pot leaf’ toasters.

  9. justagirl | Dec 22, 2011 at 4:41 pm |

    hey sweet!  now i can have the grilled cheesus i always wanted.  

  10. justagirl | Dec 22, 2011 at 4:41 pm |

    hey sweet!  now i can have the grilled cheesus i always wanted.  

  11. justagirl | Dec 22, 2011 at 12:41 pm |

    hey sweet!  now i can have the grilled cheesus i always wanted.  

  12. I want to buy one and change the case and repackage it to look like any toaster. Then give it to my religious mother as a gift.

  13. I want to buy one and change the case and repackage it to look like any toaster. Then give it to my religious mother as a gift.

  14. “Every believer has seen the videos of the Virgin Mary appearing in the
    form of a Cheeto or a linen stain and secretly hopes for an uncanny sign
    that will validate their faith”

    Yes! Let’s lump everyone into cheap stereotypes some more.
    Schmucks.

    This toaster is pretty funny though.

  15. “Every believer has seen the videos of the Virgin Mary appearing in the
    form of a Cheeto or a linen stain and secretly hopes for an uncanny sign
    that will validate their faith”

    Yes! Let’s lump everyone into cheap stereotypes some more.
    Schmucks.

    This toaster is pretty funny though.

  16. “Every believer has seen the videos of the Virgin Mary appearing in the
    form of a Cheeto or a linen stain and secretly hopes for an uncanny sign
    that will validate their faith”

    Yes! Let’s lump everyone into cheap stereotypes some more.
    Schmucks.

    This toaster is pretty funny though.

  17. “Every believer has seen the videos of the Virgin Mary appearing in the
    form of a Cheeto or a linen stain and secretly hopes for an uncanny sign
    that will validate their faith”

    Yes! Let’s lump everyone into cheap stereotypes some more.
    Schmucks.

    This toaster is pretty funny though.

  18. Damonblut | Dec 23, 2011 at 4:57 am |

    Why can’t they have one with Satan and a pentagram or inverted cross or something? 

  19. Damonblut | Dec 23, 2011 at 12:57 am |

    Why can’t they have one with Satan and a pentagram or inverted cross or something? 

  20. Alaskasue | Dec 23, 2011 at 4:10 pm |

    Ah yes, a rapturous gift indeed.  I’ll have to order several
     

  21. Alaskasue | Dec 23, 2011 at 12:10 pm |

    Ah yes, a rapturous gift indeed.  I’ll have to order several
     

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