The 8 Most Obnoxious Internet Commenters

I’m a combination of #8, #5, #6, #3 and #2.  Which are you?  (Don’t lie now, all Disinfo commenters are at least one.)  Via Cracked:

Under every video on YouTube or Break, and under every story on Digg or even right here on Cracked, there is a mini-culture that forms down in the comment section. The hit-and-run nature of the comments means it’s fertile ground for some really annoying personalities to thrive.

These are the eight commenter personality types you’d most like to avoid, but can’t because they’re freaking everywhere.

#8. The Non-Believer

Typical Comment: “FAKE! Did you see how that guy exploded just BEFORE he hit the tree. Fake, don’t waste my time.”

Who Are They? They like to think of themselves as the jaded skeptic in a world full of gullible sheeple, determined to be a flickering light of truth in a dark internet full of lies and fake viral videos. “No one could really fart on a birthday cake that way!”

Why We Hate Them: The guys we’re talking about here are the knee-jerk skeptics, the ones who take it too far. They have an automatic reaction to call “fake” on pretty much any video that shows anything remotely remarkable happening. They’re not doing it in some grand quest for truth, they just want to feel smarter than the room and generally suck all of the wonder out of the world.

This is the internet, if we want to believe some dudes can catch sunglasses on their face like that, who are they to take that from us, dammit!

Read more here.

32 Comments on "The 8 Most Obnoxious Internet Commenters"

  1. This article is effin stupid who wrote this shyt  the Republicans? If you don’t like that we can take it outside tough guy! Stop judging people we are who we are here! Yea thats right and that blood is nothin alittle “H20” and “Cl” can’t handle.

  2. Hadrian999 | Jan 26, 2012 at 5:37 pm |

    I was just checking to see if i made the list

  3. chinagreenelvis | Jan 26, 2012 at 5:42 pm |

    They forgot a few:

    The Shill (self-explanatory)
    The Guy Who Argues With People He Basically Agrees With (me)
    The Disinformer (commonly seen on The Pirate Bay, posting things like “TROJAN FOUND KAPERSKY”)

  4. I think “The Ron Paul Supporter” really ought to have their own category.

  5. Anarchy Pony | Jan 26, 2012 at 6:31 pm |

    How about every one that says first, in various ways, like 1st! And ONEst!!!1! 

  6. BrushMyTeeth | Jan 26, 2012 at 7:04 pm |

    Should I just cut out the middle man and start going directly to Cracked ?

  7. DeepCough | Jan 26, 2012 at 7:20 pm |

    Just by visiting this site, you’re officially #2. Coincidentally, there are a lot of turd opinions here as a result.

  8. Saxmanistan | Jan 26, 2012 at 9:44 pm |

    I will take my Sax elsewhere

  9. Tits or it didnt GTFO

  10. Simiantongue | Jan 26, 2012 at 11:36 pm |

    9. I’m a ranter. I usually find it difficult to say anything in less than a hundred words.

    • Calypso_1 | Jan 26, 2012 at 11:50 pm |

      Given the usual quality of your posts that hardly qualifies you as one of the ‘most obnoxious commenters’.

      • Simiantongue | Jan 27, 2012 at 10:49 am |

        Thanks, nice of you to say. Maybe not one of the “most obnoxious”, but It would certainly qualify if it were a top 20 list. lol

  11. I want honorary mention as #9: “Dude who regularly forgets that extreme sarcasm is often hard to recognize online without a disclaimer and winds up with people taking him seriously for comments that were wayyyy beyond the boundaries of good taste and probably shouldn’t have been made in the first place.”

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