Slutty Feminist = Determining One’s Own Sexuality

By on October 15, 2012 in News 32

Natalie Solidarity writes at Diatribe Media:

SlutWalk centers on empowerment of women to own their sexuality, to reconstruct or destroy traditional gender roles in which women who enjoy sex are criminalized as “sluts” and even worse, asking for rape.

“We are tired of being oppressed by slut-shaming; of being judged by our sexuality and feeling unsafe as a result. Being in charge of our sexual lives should not mean that we are opening ourselves to an expectation of violence, regardless if we participate in sex for pleasure or work. No one should equate enjoying sex with attracting sexual assault [as Toronto Police have in 2011],” (via SlutWalk Toronto)

SlutWalk stomps past raising awareness to cast off the shackles of accepted misogyny, normalized patriarchy and rape culture. Feminists (whose ranks include men, too!) are joining forces to deny their consent to this domination and seek to build a world without sexual double standards and victim blaming.

At its core, SlutWalk is a feminist awakening, seeking to undo decades of damage from cultural and societal pressures which have caused us women (and men) to believe that because we enjoy sex, there is something wrong with us. One of my favorite quotes on feminism is by Cheris Kramarae: “Feminism is the radical notion that women are human beings.”

And guess what?

HUMAN BEINGS HAVE SEX

As soon as we as a society start looking at women as beings instead of pretty, empty objects to be controlled, marginalized, and dominated. SlutWalk is forcing us, as activists to educate and empower the public across the world what it means to be human and how to treat our fellow humans as equals.

Furthermore, SlutWalk is about reconstructing consent. In the context of sex, consent is not the absence of no. Consent is:

Fuck YES! I want to explore YOUR body and my SEXUALITY and our mutual ATTRACTION until we both feel AMAZING together!

or something like that. That, or something like that, is my declaration of sexual consent. Sometimes I’ve said with my eyes, most times I say it with big, loud tomboy mouth. And I’ve had some great sex because I know when I really want my partner to put his/her hands on me. Because I’ve defined what consent means, I can continue enjoying the electricity of physical human contact on the terms that function best for me. If that makes me a slutty feminist, I own it.

Read the full post at Diatribe Media.

, , , ,

  • Xdreamawakex

     Supporting this movement is an essential next step . One : to declare that consensual sex of any kind is not a crime and though some practices may not be for everyone it is not universally immoral. Sex is innocent , it is people that may not be. It is on how you attain sex that is the crime or immoral ! Two : Double standards , pseudo morals , and distorting views on healthy sex and sexuality causes and creates    
    a murky world due to fear of social repercussions that real criminals thrive in . Rape, blackmail , coercion and sometimes even murder are symptoms ,not that promotes these behaviors but , where criminals and social exploiters find havens. If we allow these cultures and practices to be done in the “light” and hold ALL people to one standard . These criminals and exploiters will have less refuge and that will serve all of society better as we will better separate the weeds from the wheat , let them grow. 

  • Xdreamawakex

     Supporting this movement is an essential next step . One : to declare that consensual sex of any kind is not a crime and though some practices may not be for everyone it is not universally immoral. Sex is innocent , it is people that may not be. It is on how you attain sex that is the crime or immoral ! Two : Double standards , pseudo morals , and distorting views on healthy sex and sexuality causes and creates    
    a murky world due to fear of social repercussions that real criminals thrive in . Rape, blackmail , coercion and sometimes even murder are symptoms ,not that promotes these behaviors but , where criminals and social exploiters find havens. If we allow these cultures and practices to be done in the “light” and hold ALL people to one standard . These criminals and exploiters will have less refuge and that will serve all of society better as we will better separate the weeds from the wheat , let them grow. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/eric.fischer.73 Eric Fischer

    Oh good grief. 
    If you insist on REdefining what the word “consent” means, you must apply it across the board.

    So if, as Miss/Ms Solidarity states, Consent is NOT:
    -if you want to
    -okay, because you bought xxxxxxxxxxxx
    -sure, because it will shut you up
    -I guess, because i’m obligated to, because of our monogamy

    Then I guess that means my girlfriend actually kidnapped me when I reluctantly agreed to go see some movie  that I had no real interest in seeing but felt obligated to go.
    The cop who searched my car is guilty of trespassing because I didn’t really say “FUCK YES! I’ve been dying to have some strange guy in a blue Nazi uniform rummage through my stuff. What took you so long to ask?” I really just wanted to shut him up so I could be on my way.

    Whether the Slutwalkers like it or not, “If you want to,” “okay,” “sure,” and “I guess,” ARE consent unless it is a situation of “I guess, because I don’t want to lose my job,” or “okay, if it will prevent you from plunging that knife into my throat.”

  • http://www.facebook.com/eric.fischer.73 Eric Fischer

    Oh good grief. 
    If you insist on REdefining what the word “consent” means, you must apply it across the board.

    So if, as Miss/Ms Solidarity states, Consent is NOT:
    -if you want to
    -okay, because you bought xxxxxxxxxxxx
    -sure, because it will shut you up
    -I guess, because i’m obligated to, because of our monogamy

    Then I guess that means my girlfriend actually kidnapped me when I reluctantly agreed to go see some movie  that I had no real interest in seeing but felt obligated to go.
    The cop who searched my car is guilty of trespassing because I didn’t really say “FUCK YES! I’ve been dying to have some strange guy in a blue Nazi uniform rummage through my stuff. What took you so long to ask?” I really just wanted to shut him up so I could be on my way.

    Whether the Slutwalkers like it or not, “If you want to,” “okay,” “sure,” and “I guess,” ARE consent unless it is a situation of “I guess, because I don’t want to lose my job,” or “okay, if it will prevent you from plunging that knife into my throat.”

    • bobbiethejean

      If you were pussy enough to let your girlfriend con you into seeing a movie you didn’t really want to see, you deserved it. [/sarcasm]

    • bobbiethejean

      If you were pussy enough to let your girlfriend con you into seeing a movie you didn’t really want to see, you deserved it. [/sarcasm]

      • http://www.facebook.com/eric.fischer.73 Eric Fischer

        True. Much like a drunk slut staggering down the road half-dressed, I was asking for it. ;) [also sarcasm]

      • http://www.facebook.com/eric.fischer.73 Eric Fischer

        True. Much like a drunk slut staggering down the road half-dressed, I was asking for it. ;) [also sarcasm]

      • http://www.facebook.com/eric.fischer.73 Eric Fischer

        True. Much like a drunk slut staggering down the road half-dressed, I was asking for it. ;) [also sarcasm]

        • Calypso_1

          Once I saw a half-dressed, drunk slut staggering down the road, bottle of Beam in hand.  She was about five months pregnant.  She was still asking for it because her pimp would beat her if she didn’t.
          [no sarcasm]

        • Calypso_1

          Once I saw a half-dressed, drunk slut staggering down the road, bottle of Beam in hand.  She was about five months pregnant.  She was still asking for it because her pimp would beat her if she didn’t.
          [no sarcasm]

          • Stephen Reichman

            Yeah, so all the girls who are half-naked have pimps making them dress that way

            [absolutely sarcasm]

            Communicating sexual availability through dress or changes in appearance is common in the animal kingdom, as well as in human beings (most of our communication is non-verbal). It is arguable that non-verbal “FUCK YES” is screaming out of half-naked women, and a verbal no (about 5% of the conversation) is a really bad way to say “no” – try non-verbal communication – it works.

          • Stephen Reichman

            Yeah, so all the girls who are half-naked have pimps making them dress that way

            [absolutely sarcasm]

            Communicating sexual availability through dress or changes in appearance is common in the animal kingdom, as well as in human beings (most of our communication is non-verbal). It is arguable that non-verbal “FUCK YES” is screaming out of half-naked women, and a verbal no (about 5% of the conversation) is a really bad way to say “no” – try non-verbal communication – it works.

          • http://www.ContraControl.com/ Zenc

            Bitch had to pay for the abortion somehow.

          • http://www.ContraControl.com/ Zenc

            Bitch had to pay for the abortion somehow.

          • Calypso_1

            They probably planned on selling the poor FAS bastard to the carnies. 

          • Calypso_1

            They probably planned on selling the poor FAS bastard to the carnies. 

          • http://www.facebook.com/eric.fischer.73 Eric Fischer

            But he only beat her because he cares SO MUCH. Nobody else understands him like she does.

          • http://www.facebook.com/eric.fischer.73 Eric Fischer

            But he only beat her because he cares SO MUCH. Nobody else understands him like she does.

          • Calypso_1

            Any man that needed to be understood by the Lot Lizards in that hell hole deserved the mutant neurosyphilis and crackrock cocktail that was the ‘speciality’ of those denizens of  Dixieland’s underbelly.  You ever see a pretty boy wearin’ a coon ‘bone’ round his neck? – Nasty little things those ones. 

            I can still smell the sweet odor of the slaughter house mixed with creosote floating off the river at night.  Close quarters gangland, condition one carry, all the time…good times; politicians can be found in the most unlikely of places; somebody has to fill out the paperwork for when the big guys come down to the southside for a photo-op.

          • Calypso_1

            Any man that needed to be understood by the Lot Lizards in that hell hole deserved the mutant neurosyphilis and crackrock cocktail that was the ‘speciality’ of those denizens of  Dixieland’s underbelly.  You ever see a pretty boy wearin’ a coon ‘bone’ round his neck? – Nasty little things those ones. 

            I can still smell the sweet odor of the slaughter house mixed with creosote floating off the river at night.  Close quarters gangland, condition one carry, all the time…good times; politicians can be found in the most unlikely of places; somebody has to fill out the paperwork for when the big guys come down to the southside for a photo-op.

  • http://www.zoboprepublic.wordpress.com/ zobop republic

    This SlutWalk seems to be catching on.  Is this the beginning of a ‘new’ movement?

  • http://www.zoboprepublic.wordpress.com/ zobop republic

    This SlutWalk seems to be catching on.  Is this the beginning of a ‘new’ movement?

    • http://skadhitheravernerblog.wordpress.com/ Skadhi_the_Raverner

      No its the dying throes of feminism, a movement less and less people can take seriously nowadays. Feminism failed to address the double standard – in fact it failed because the double standard reflects human biology. The sexual revolution left them with two routes, one is the route of slut walks and liberalised abortion, in which women are more than ever objects to be exploited by men. The other is radical feminists siding with the religious right against pornography. Both of them are ridiculous.

  • Marco

    100 NO’s and a YES is still a YES. 

  • Marco

    100 NO’s and a YES is still a YES. 

  • Jerry Vanskyhawk

    Do women get ejaculation amnesia? Let me explain if you are unfamiliar with the term. Ejaculation amnesia is when a guy gets turned on and has sex with a women he normally wouldn’t have. Then directly after ejaculating he wants nothing to do with that women and has no idea why he had sex with her in the first place. Do women get that, because it’s something that happens to ALMOST all men. 

    I believe this phenomena (along with alcohol) makes it so undesirable women can still get laid. But the point I was trying to make is that men have sex with women they don’t really want to have sex with all the time. We just don’t bitch about it. 

    • Dubstepjunkie

      WOW, I know your trolling, but that’s actually true..  

    • StillAtMyMoms

       Tell me you’re joking!  This is why I’m single.  *subsequently googles the term*

    • StillAtMyMoms

       Tell me you’re joking!  This is why I’m single.  *subsequently googles the term*

  • http://skadhitheravernerblog.wordpress.com/ Skadhi_the_Raverner

    Yea human beings have sex, it soesn’t mean being a slut though.

    Check out Chateau Heartiste to learn why this movement’s views on gender and sexuality are wrong on so many levels I can’t be bothered to sit all night debunking it myself.

    And consent is a poorly defined weasel word.

  • http://skadhitheravernerblog.wordpress.com/ Skadhi_the_Raverner

    Yea human beings have sex, it soesn’t mean being a slut though.

    Check out Chateau Heartiste to learn why this movement’s views on gender and sexuality are wrong on so many levels I can’t be bothered to sit all night debunking it myself.

    And consent is a poorly defined weasel word.