Iran Battles Plague Of Giant Genetically Mutated Rats

SINA English reports on the perils of city living:

Iran has sent in sniper teams to clear Tehran’s streets from the massive rodents weighting up to five kilos plaguing 26 district of the Iranian capital, the city’s environmental agency said.

“They seem to have had a genetic mutation, probably as a result of radiations and the chemical used on them,” said Ismail Kahram, Teheran city council environment adviser.

“They are now bigger and look different. These are changes that normally take millions of years of evolution. They have jumped from 60 grams to five kilos, and cats are now smaller than them.”

The “mutated rats” have been running rampant in the capital, as traditional poison appear to have no effect on them. To stop them, the council has deployed ten snipers teams armed with infra-red sighted rifles. So far 2,205 rats have been shot dead.

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  • Anarchy Pony

    It’s only a matter of time ’til the streets are takin’ over by greasels.

    http://deusex.wikia.com/wiki/File:Phase2_Greasel.jpg

    • Anarchy Pony

      Oh come on, you can’t tell me that none of the disinfonauts are Deus Ex fans.

      • echar

        I’ve played it. I think I lost interest at the last boss though.

        • Anarchy Pony

          Which one? There are 3.

        • Anarchy Pony

          Which one? There are 3.

          • echar

            Deus Ex 3 :)

          • Anarchy Pony

            While I appreciated the improved graphics and gameplay of human revolution, the first two were much more sophisticated.

          • echar

            I didn’t play those two, If I come across them I will check them out. Thanks for the recommend.

          • echar

            I didn’t play those two, If I come across them I will check them out. Thanks for the recommend.

          • Anarchy Pony

            If you’ve got steam, you can get them on there.

    • Spasmodius

      Green, greasy greasels.

    • Spasmodius

      Green, greasy greasels.

  • Sean A Duncan

    “That’s not a kitten. That’s a jumbo-sized sewer rat!” -original Adventures in Babysitting

    • http://www.facebook.com/jacob.garrison.31 Jacob Garrison

      There’s a sequel?

  • AL

    I use to work a few blocks from Farmer John factory in L.A. -CA….. The rat on the picture is way smaller than the ones i use to see coming out of work at 10PM.

  • InfvoCuernos

    …or maybe they’re just small possums, which might be even more sinister since possums are only found in the US.

    • JaceD

      lulwat? Are you talking about a particular species, or just possums in general?

    • Anarchy Pony

      Possums aren’t rodents. A simple examination of their front teeth should be enough to differentiate them.

    • http://twitter.com/BozoDeathGod BozoDeathGod

      Could be related to the Transylvanian Armadillo.

  • BuzzCoastin

    psssssh, dat’s nuttin
    there’s mutant rats that’s been plaguing the US for hundreds of years
    called the Federal Government

  • Sir Legendhead

    And soon the day came when hyperevolved turtles followed their rodent comrades! They organized underneath the cities of man, gaining higher intelligence and dispensing justice as they saw fit.