It Turns Out Satan Is Pro-Life

2802da9bbca77c969204b1da4725ab8bTim Stanley writes in the Telegraph:

Earlier this week, I wrote about pro-abortion activists chanting “Hail Satan!” in an effort to drown out a chorus of Amazing Grace at a rally in Texas. Tongue-in-cheek, I wrote, “I’m guessing that even the Horned One would regard association with the US abortion industry as bad PR.” I meant it as a joke but, er, it turns out I was right.

A writer at the WND website spotted that the UK Church of Satan Tweeted this after the story broke:

Unfortunate to see Satan’s name used in such a diabolical manner. Another example of what ‘Satanism’ doesn’t represent. #HailSatan

— UK Church of Satan (@UKChurchofSatan) July 3, 2013

Yep, it turns out that the UK Church of Satan is prolife. They later Tweeted, “Why wouldn’t Satanism be pro-life? What else is there? We are all free to make choices. Agreeable or not. Everyone is entitled to choice.” I wonder what Mike Huckabee would think?

So, it’s official. Even devil worshippers want nothing to do with the abortion lobby – even people who sacrifice chickens to the moon goddess and dream of eternal damnation with the Lord of Flies find abortion ethically distasteful. Time for Nancy Pelosi to rethink her stance on the issue. Otherwise, she’s at risk of losing a key demographic in 2014…

  • Carlos Panzram

    “people who sacrifice chickens to the moon goddess and dream of eternal damnation with the Lord of Flies ” insightful stuff.

    • Adamas Macalz

      that sounded like something I would read in the Malefica Maleficarum… the world keeps spinning but not a goddamn thing changes

  • doodahman

    More babies = more flesh; more flesh = more sin; more sin = higher returns on Satan’s 401k.
    Do the math.

  • hagbard23

    Who gives any degree of a shit what the Church of Satan thinks these days?

  • Thad McKraken

    The problem with this is that the…for the millionth time…THE CHURCH OF SATAN DOES NOT BELIEVE IN SATAN. They are a-spiritualists who essentially believe in Ayn Rand’s objectivism. They call themselves the Church of Satan for the same reason Marilyn Manson called himself the Anti-Christ superstar. Great PR angle, and they only reason you’re talking about them in posts like this. If they called themselves Objectivists, no one would give a shit.

    • Polybius
    • Ted Toppel

      I do not see why it matters whether or not they believe in satan, as the article was stating that the Church of Satan is pro-life.

    • echar

      from my perspective, They are a brand of humanists who are a direct reaction to the catholic church.

    • bobbiethejean

      Unlike Satan, Ayn Rand was a real being and she was also actually legitimately evil.

      • Matt Staggs

        The Church of Satan also does not believe in the mythical being Satan.

    • Matt Staggs

      Amen. They’re Goth Objectivists.

  • Deteis

    “Abortion Lobby”?

    I’m sure thats really a thing…