Gay Marriage is Scientifically Impossible Because Magnets

img-thingMagnets: How Do They Work? If you’re attempting to prove that gay marriage is scientifically impossible then the answer is not very well. Not. Very. Well. A Nigerian student has attempted to use magnets to “scientifically” prove that gay marriage is impossible.

Death and Taxes:

A bar magnet is a horizontal magnet that has the North Pole and the South Pole and when you bring two bar magnets and you bring the North Pole together you find that the two North Poles will not attract. They will repel, that is, they will push away themselves showing that a man should not attract a man. If you bring two South Poles together you find that the two South Poles will not attract indicating that same sex marriage should not hold. A female should not attract a female as South Pole of a magnet does not attract the South Pole of a magnet.

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  • Rex Vestri
    • Anarchy Pony

      Dude, I totally forgot about that arc. That was hilarious!

  • lifobryan

    OK, cool. Got it. But why, I ask you, WHY then are magnets so attracted to refrigerators? Does this not prove the various Laws of Homodynamics?

    • Danny Adams

      Unless they’re frigid.

  • jasonpaulhayes

    “Magic everywhere in this Bitch” Violent J

  • Gergith

    Couldn’t his paper be used as a proof for homosexual 69′s? :D

  • InfvoCuernos

    If at any time you find yourself on the same side of a scientific argument as the ICP, then you are wrong. Also, you aren’t fooling anybody by talking about how wrong being gay is because there isn’t much in the universe that is gay-er than white guys rapping in clown makeup. Overcompensation much?

    • I_abide

      You might be confusing gay with white trash.

      • InfvoCuernos

        Contrary to popular belief, they are not mutually exclusive.

  • リカルド 忍者の心

    Someone forgot to told this student (or it would be better calling him “stupident”?) that all magnets have both the North and the South Poles, there’s no magnet with only one pole. Maybe what he needs is to attract another kind of pole to his back, to make him stop with this pseudoscientific homophobic bullshit and assume his real sexuality (’cause all homophobes are frustated gays that don’t have enough courage to get out of the closet and to accept themselves as they are).

    • atlanticus

      If anything, this is evidence for how snails are all attracted to each other. (Seriously, go look up pictures of how snails mate…fascinating…)

      • Calypso_1

        I assume you have seen Microcosmos?

        • atlanticus

          I’m not certain. I watch a lot of nature videos from the VHS discount bin at the re-sale shop…so, possibly?

          • Calypso_1

            It has the operatic L’amour des escargots.

            http://vimeo.com/7164332

          • atlanticus

            Ah, yes, perhaps I have.

            Disturbingly sensual…will it ever work? A Glaucus atlanticus and a Helix pomatia? I can only dream…

    • BuzzCoastin

      A magnetic monopole is a hypothetical particle in particle physics that is an isolated magnet with only one magnetic pole (a north pole without a south pole or vice-versa).

  • Anarchy Pony

    Lolwut?

  • Hocketeer

    Repulsive.

  • jasonpaulhayes

    Fascinatingly naive.

  • Bruteloop

    Dumb breeder.

    • alittleunwell

      Jealous? Sure you can “breed” but not with the love of your life. :(
      Ugliness attracts ugliness that is for sure and it doesn’t feel good does it?
      Here’s the deal about gay marriage, who cares if two people of the same sex want to live together? Just don’t change the marriage laws, that opens up a Pandora’s box of possible abuses to marriage.
      Seems to me though that gays are really looking for confirmation of their union as legit in the eyes of all society. That day will never come. Society will look away, ignore it, even support certain rights for gays but it will always be looked at as something to be pitied.

      • Zebra

        “but it will always be looked at as something to be pitied.” Yes you are indeed ‘a little unwell’. I pity you – you obviously need help.

        • alittleunwell

          That’s the reality of it, plain and simple. You can pity me all you want it doesn’t affect me one way or the other. The fact is while many participate in these “unions” for the sake of their loved ones the hurt and shame runs deep. You can pretend all you want that shame doesn’t exist but it does.
          Furthermore, I normally wouldn’t have said anything but when you have someone refering to heterosexuals as “breeders” or “dumb breeders” you’re going to get an ugly response. I didn’t notice anyone taking issue with his ridiculous comment.

          • Andrew

            I didn’t take issue with it because I got the joke.

            What I’m not sure of is why you’re so defensive about your alleged heterosexuality.

          • alittleunwell

            I take issue for a lot of reasons, let me give you a few. First off I don’t think he was joking. This “breeder” comment shows up all the time now on pages that speak about gay rights or abortion issues. It’s often said by people with disgust towards those of us who live a traditional life style.

            Second, my best friend is gay, we’ve been friends for over 30 years. I have been at the receiving end of many hateful comments from people who hate homosexuals because they thought we were a couple. If you think gays haven’t made progress you should have been around 30 years ago. There were times I actually feared for my life.

            I’ve gone head to head with people in my church over ministry to the gay community and with individuals over attitudes towards homosexuals that, IMO, are sinful. I have family members that are gay so this is where the real rub comes in for me.

            There was a time when people were willing to look the other way. A time when people said let them be, who are they hurting. Those days are gone. Now gays are just as insulting, hateful, ignorant as those they condemn and they can spew hate with the best of them. Just read the comments on this page if you don’t believe me. Heaven forbid someone make a comment gays take offense to, especially a celebrity. A celebrities career is over if they make a comment the gay community considers negative. But gays have no problem bashing people of faith, conservatives, couples or anyone that crosses them. Well except for Muslims, they don’t seem to have an issue with Muslims, probably because they’re afraid.

            What I see now is a reversal in the progress gays have made and it stems from the vicious way people are attacked that disagree with them. It’s causing problems for gays in schools all the way up. People who before would have said “Who are they hurting” are now saying “How can we fight back?”.

            Keep on joking but I guarantee you people besides myself take issue with it. Breeders all over the world have about had it. Guess what? Most breeders are not Christian. They’re not praying and they’re not turning the other cheek when they’re being insulted. Gays think Christians are their enemies and they’re so wrong. They need to be concerned about those that are not bound by moral or religious constraints.

            These comments, and they’re everywhere, are hurting the gay community. My comment was nothing compared to what is really said in the world today.

          • Bruteloop

            I was joking. He got the joke because it was out there for all to get it. However, I wasn’t aware that ‘breeder’ turns up on pages about gay rights or abortion because I don’t spend any time looking at them. If so, please believe me, it really was meant as a joke.
            Please do not think that your wish to lead ‘traditional lifestyle’ is in any way comparably oppressed however.
            You use words like ‘pity’, ‘shame’ and ‘sin’. Pity is what people do to those they feel are not as blessed as themselves.. Shame is what people can make others feel. Sin is what people accuse others of.
            As long as you struggle to fit your selfhood, being and life as well as interpret that of others within the parameters you choose you will always see everything in terms of transgression and punishment.
            I have no feelings of disgust towards anyone who chooses to live a ‘traditional’ lifestyle although it seems utterly ironic that the life I lead would tick every box in that matter other than two – I choose to live it with another man and we are not allowed to marry.
            The only lifestyle that would disgust me is one that involved the suppression and negation of another’s. Something we in the West are all guilty of but in ways not immediately pertinent to this exchange. I would imagine the other members of your church you mention, whose attitudes to homosexuality differ from yours, see their lifestyle as ‘traditional’ as well.

            Any shame I felt when I was younger I was taught to feel.
            Look above my comment and you will see ‘two white guys rapping in clown make up’ described as one of the gay-est things in the universe. In other words, ‘gay’ as ‘lame’. Ironically, another word whose meaning has been ‘stretched’. Personally, I don’t get myself in a twist about people describing things as ‘gay’ in that manner. There are worse things to worry about in the world and I actually wish a word other than ‘gay’ had been chosen anyway. I don’t readily identify with it.
            Be that as it may, you missed that comment ad found mine upsetting.
            That was the double standard I was making the joke about.
            And…it really was a joke.

            The elephant in the room here is your religion, the tenets of which you struggle to adapt to the world around you. I salute you for trying to do so. But I fear that it will always be a struggle.

      • Bruteloop

        It was an attempt at an ironic reflection of the hateful name calling and worse the excuse for thinking shown above always leads to. Calling out a person in a hateful way for being purely what they are.Jealous. Not in the least. I am not even sure there is much point in adopting an increasingly outmoded and dysfunctional institution. I don’t think marriage can be anymore abused than it already has by those who have the privilege. However, I can see no good reason why any heterosexual should have a right I do not. There are more of you? So what. That has no more import than there being less of us. Neither is better than the other. Your fear of this Pandora’s box and your talk of pity suggests more about your own insecurity and prejudice than the reality of the issue. I think you are right. The day will never come when there is not ignorance, prejudice, hatred and a misguided sense of biological supremacy. That sorry fact is nothing to celebrate. Save your pity. I am successful, happy and unencumbered by debt or worry. I may be queer but I’m not a victim.

        • alittleunwell

          Good! Don’t be a victim! Be happy with who you are and what you have. No one wants to deal with people who think they’re victims and yes there will always be bigotry and prejudice. But know this, evil begets evil. When the name calling starts you lose someone who may have listened to what you might have said.
          So what is it that gays want? Do they want to look down on others so they can feel better about themselves? That’s what his comment felt like to me. Be mad or whatever but my response was mild compared to most. Seriously, to call people dumb breeders is so ironic. It’s almost laughable.

          • Bruteloop

            You really are just not getting it. It was meant to be ironic. It was a mirror of all the times people use the word ‘faggot’ or describe things as ‘gay’. Along with ‘bitch’ those two words seem to form the arsenal of most heterosexual men’s (boys) insults on many forums on the internet. Check out the comments section on Youtube. All I was doing was turning the tables, briefly and ironically, and it really has upset you. Tell you what, the name calling almost invariably comes from heterosexual ‘men’, albeit ones that are none too bright. But it is rife. As an adult gay man I se homophobic remarks on the internet every single day I choose to go online. The ‘evil’ you mention is engendered by ignorant heterosexual men against women, gay men, lesbians and transgender people. In other words, anyone who is different to them. Those are the ones you should be finger wagging at.
            I can’t speak for all gays no more than you can speak for all heterosexuals.
            Personally, I would like to live in a world which was free from people who would wish to do me harm because of my sexuality. Something I have no more control over than you do yours. Your talk of pity in your first post would suggest you look down on others even if you delude yourself it has something to do with compassion. I would dare to suggest that gay men and women and every other outcast from the white, heterosexual hegemony want pretty well the same as you do. To live a life unencumbered by the ignorance, prejudice and hatred of others.

  • http://voxmagi-necessarywords.blogspot.com/ VoxMagi

    And I thought our homophobes here at home were a little less than bright! It’s nice to be humbled and reminded that, no, it isn’t just our home-grown nimrods that are pushing the boundaries of stupidity while still maintaining the ability to manage basic functions like breathing, talking, and parroting back enough data to attend a school. Countries everywhere are burdened with a plethora of mouthbreathing eTards whose screeds are so stunningly fail-riddled that other life forms have trouble looking at them directly without being blinded by the horror.

  • Ted Heistman

    Actually there is something to sexual polarity, its just that there is a lot of human variation in how its expressed, also everyone contains both polarities.

  • davidplumer

    Apples. Oranges.

  • Rob Lai

    Comedy Gold!

  • BuzzCoastin

    that Chibuihem Amalaha
    he’s such a world class punkster
    always with the jibes that set the whirled a twitter

    but I do think he’s talking the pole thing to an extreme unction

  • DrDavidKelly

    Why are the concepts ‘magnet’ and ‘person’ interchangeable?

  • Brother John

    OK, I don’t know if the writer of that quote is silly and misled, or if those who posted it here and responded to it are; but that would be an example of an illustration, not evidence.

    This would be like someone citing a movie – a work of fiction – as evidence to back up an assertion on gang violence. It may illustrate your point but it proves nothing.

  • ISHMAEL777

    …….

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