Denver Police To Use “Nasal Ranger” To Track Sources Of Marijuana Smoke

nasal_ranger

Alternet notes the latest advance in being a narc – cops prowling the streets holding up what appear to be hair dryers in front of their faces:

Denver, Colorado—one of the cities in the country to legalize marijuana use—has passed a new “odor ordinance” with a potential $2,000 fine for anyone found guilty of polluting the atmosphere with high concentrations of cannabis. And the police department’s plan for enforcement is a strange-looking device called an olfactometer, or more collquially, the “nose telescope.”

According to the odor ordinance, the smell is viewed as problematic if it is detectable once the smoke is mixed with seven times the volume of clean air. Denver police plan to use the “nose telecope” to enforce the ordinance.

The most sophisticated version of the “Nasal Ranger” nose telescope has the ability to record both the concentration of marijuana in the air, as well as the GPS coordinates of where the smell is emanating from—available for $3,500.

 

16 Comments on "Denver Police To Use “Nasal Ranger” To Track Sources Of Marijuana Smoke"

  1. Now that it is legal there, they gotta nickle and dime people some way. In my opinion, canibus is one of the best fragrances out there. Besides palo santo, sandalwood, and nag champa.

  2. Holy shit, it’s just like the professor’s smellascope from Futurama.
    “Good news, everyone!”

  3. Garrett Schaefer | Nov 25, 2013 at 3:13 pm |

    Weed smells great. I don’t understand how this is a crime if cigarettes can be smoked outdoors.

  4. Garrett Schaefer | Nov 25, 2013 at 3:14 pm |

    What percentage of a cops’ shift will be spent trying to walk around sniffing out someone getting high legally, as opposed to getting to know a beat and participating in investigations of REAL crimes?

  5. Conspiracy Carrot | Nov 25, 2013 at 3:58 pm |

    *drops a deuce right in front of Officer Pig Nose* Track that shit, Bozo.

  6. Denver should pass an ordinance against smelling like bacon.

  7. InfvoCuernos | Nov 25, 2013 at 7:54 pm |

    Well, it sure didn’t take long for the pigs to find a workaround to the will of the people. What’s that, officer O’malley? Got too much time on your hands now that you can’t chase after those pot heads? Here’s a new ordnance that pisses directly in the face of the voters’ wishes in order to fleece the public of more money and maintain the “war on drugs”. Who here still thinks your vote counts?

  8. emperorreagan | Nov 25, 2013 at 10:18 pm |

    That thing is just asking for an open-handed slap.

  9. DeepCough | Nov 25, 2013 at 11:14 pm |

    I have a better idea. How about the Nasal Ranger be repurposed for weeding out (pun very much intended) the good bud from the bad shit.

  10. Rhoid Rager | Nov 25, 2013 at 11:15 pm |

    How foul.

  11. Boo_Radley | Nov 26, 2013 at 8:25 am |

    This LOOKs like a scam device that doesn’t really work. Someone is making a killing off police stupidity.

    • nedmorlef | Nov 28, 2013 at 8:40 am |

      the police will say it works and the fines will be added to the List of Charges they already throw at us.

  12. stop this shit. we need to be on the street protesting until is necessary . i wonder what it takes to get americans to go out on the street. obviously the NSA was not enough. government shutdown was not enough either

    WHAT does it take !! does direct TV have to shutdown along with comcast along with all the Wireless companies?

    I wonder man…

  13. Other Mr. T | Nov 26, 2013 at 10:24 am |

    officer ardvark likes to be photographed writing pot smokers tickets wearing his redicu-lick-u-dickulusly sexy shnoz-a-matic 3000. anything that makes cops look like freakin idiots is tax payer maoney well spent.

  14. Is Douglas Adams working for the DEA now?

    (This thing looks a helluva lot funnier when you’re stoned, by the way.)

  15. nedmorlef | Nov 28, 2013 at 8:44 am |

    Can’t steal your property so they’re gonna steal your groceries.

Comments are closed.