The Future of Booze May Be Here

The future of boozeMan, I have been saying this since I was a teenager and it’s become even more glaring as technology advances. So, you can make it so I can access the internet on my goddamn phone but you can’t make something that mimics the socially liberating effects of alcohol without making me hungover or fat? Well, apparently this potentiality I’ve been talking about since I was roughly 14 is now right around the corner. Particularly pertinent in my world, as I’ve had to abandon my hard drinking lifestyle in the last few years because it became obvious my body couldn’t handle it any more. I’ve been bored ever since. What’s also fascinating about this is that it’s being championed by the dude who got fired by the British government for pointing out that alcohol and cigarettes are more dangerous than most illegal drugs:

“I’ve done the prototype experiments myself,” he said. “I’ve been inebriated and then it’s been reversed by the antagonist. That’s what really gave us the idea. There’s no question that you can produce a whole range of effects like alcohol by manipulating the brain.”

According to Nutt, the effects from taking the drunk without alcohol pill may be blocked immediately by taking an antidote, so the ‘drinkers’ would potentially be able to drive or return to work immediately after consumption.

Professor Nutt and his team at Imperial College London have been faced with a major obstacle, since, as expected, no one in the alcohol industry is willing to fund the development of a drunk without alcohol pill.

Read the rest here

Freaking awesome, and why someone isn’t getting a gajillion dollars to fund this I have no idea. If legalized, there is absolutely no way it will lose money. Just tell me where to invest and you’ll have a check later this afternoon. Now if we can finally get that translucent STD blocking sex lube we’ve been hearing about for years we’ll be onto something.

(as always, friend me on Facebook for Occult weirdness, Twitter for extended dementia)

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  • Anarchy Pony

    This shit needs to get canned ASAP as I’m trying to break into the apple liquor business. Too many apples that go unused, might as well make em into booze.

    • InfvoCuernos

      There’s always the apple cider vinegar market.

      • Anarchy Pony

        I’m also considering other niche alcoholic beverages like mead with various berry accents. Go for a more “natural” bent on the booze.

        • Tuco

          Make a Gruit beer. ale. There aren’t any out there in the marketplace right now (that I can find anyway).

          • Anarchy Pony

            Didn’t Hank Schrader shoot you to death?

          • Rhoid Rager

            Zombie Tuco… I’m getting my AMC shows crossed.

            btw, I’m glad they finally got over that blood pneumonia flu from hell. That was a frustrating couple of episodes.

          • InfvoCuernos

            Would have been more interesting if it had been blood diarrhea. Just about every episode of that show is frustrating.

          • Rhoid Rager

            I was a bit incredulous at the idea of swine flu from three pigs in a moderately roomy pen. I’m surprised that there hasn’t been a cholera outbreak, actually. When I saw Carol unclogging their jerry-rigged pump inlet in the fucking fetid ditch water on the zombie side of the fence, I wondered what kind of space-age nano-carbon filter they were using to get all that Walker pus and shit out of their drinking and irrigation water. I gots to get me one of those.

            Sorry to ruin it all with logic, though.

          • InfvoCuernos

            Ya, I had the same thought about that, and also how they were getting rid of waste in general, but especially in the quarantined cell block.

          • Anarchy Pony

            Are we sure that’s the end of it though?

          • Rhoid Rager

            Well they seemed to segue quick into the Governor. (I think they have run a bit short on writing ideas). Maybe the Governor will catch the flu, and we’ll be spared from a frustrating battle scene, where the Governor takes out a few main characters and is finally cut in half by Michonne or stabbed in the other eye by Rick.

          • Rhoid Rager

            Hate to say this, but I called that, didn’t I? That was a frustrating watch. I can’t believe Hershel’s dead. Almost as bad as when Dale died…

          • Anarchy Pony

            I heard that. It was pretty kickass when Darryl Put that grenade down the tank’s cannon though.

          • jnana

            that’s gruit ale, to be specific ;)

            I love the stuff I made. I used wormwood and yarrow. was a mild, energetic buzz that gave everyone vivid dreams.

            have you tried gruit? i’m curious what others think of it.

          • Tuco

            No, I haven’t tried it (I didn’t have a chance to before Hank Schrader shot me). I’d love to, but I can’t find any. I’ve read great stuff about it.

        • jnana

          I gotta good mead recipe. throw in a shit ton of apples and raisins and add cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves. throw in some lemons and black tea bags in for yeast nutrients. try it after 2 weeks if you like it sweet. wait a month or more to get it a bit more dry and alcoholoic

    • Rhoid Rager

      You doing the brewing urself? Apple provide their own yeast, don’t they? You doing some kind of distilling to get it into a liquor?

      • Anarchy Pony

        At this point I’m just in the reading up phase, but we have a small orchard and the vast majority of the apples get wasted, so I’m toying with ideas on how to use them. Producing cider and applejack seems like a pretty good way to do it.

        • Rhoid Rager

          Run with it, d00d. I tried to feed my old apples to my chickens, but they would never eat them.

        • Guest

          don’t forget about apple cider vinegar. that shit works miracles

        • Jin The Ninja

          tres entreprenurial of you. it’s a really rad idea;)

          • Anarchy Pony

            Well the follow through will be the real trick.

    • The Well Dressed Man

      I guess applejack was a really popular spirit during colonial times, before brandy took off. Been out of the industry for a year now, but if the craft cocktail bubble hasn’t burst, the “mixologists” will be looking for the next big thing.

      • Anarchy Pony

        Now that I think on it, I don’t believe applejack will be something I can make, I don’t have the very low winter temperatures in my region necessary for it.

        • The Well Dressed Man

          I’m sure you’d get better results working with a still anyways.

    • Cortacespedes

      Schnapps and hard cider. Just read an article about a German woman who runs a B&B and serves her guests homemade schnapps. Nice.

      I made and bottled applesauce and dehydrated chips cause I am lame.

      Two more bushels to go.

      • Jin The Ninja

        nothing lame about homemade.

        bags of apple chips are much too insubstantial for the price.
        the same with kale chips. i’d much rather make my own.

        • Cortacespedes

          You’re right about that. Anything you can do for yourself is a triumph in this day and age. But I make applesauce every year. T’would be nice to make a different type of “sauce” in the future.

    • oneironauticus

      APPLEJACK! :D

      • Anarchy Pony

        Is an alcoholic beverage that the Apple family probably does manufacture and consume during the winter months.

  • grummbunger

    you have been talking about booze since you were 14? what a lush. lost me at that.

  • InfvoCuernos

    I wonder what the down side is? I haven’t had a drink in years, mainly due to health and DUI considerations, but this looks like it solves both-almost too well. It almost seems like something the Onion would post.

  • http://hormeticminds.blogspot.com/ Chaorder Gradient

    I thought this was going to be talking about butt-chugging for a second.

    • Rhoid Rager

      Have you had your rum enema today?

      • http://hormeticminds.blogspot.com/ Chaorder Gradient

        It’ll Get ya Drunk!

  • Photons

    I am reminded of soma.

  • BrianApocalypse

    This sounds great. Lately I’ve been wanting some sort of drug that doesn’t blast one’s mind into thousands of psychedelic fragments. Something more manageable and enjoyable would be great. I’ve also been unable to get drunk for years for some reason. The only effect drinking alcohol has on me is feeling kind of crappy, there’s no “high” in the experience for me anymore, so I just don’t bother.

    But the antidote is the icing on the cake. An altered state with an off switch is something I’ve desired for a long time.

  • emperorreagan

    But what will happen to this?! http://www.intox.com/drinkwheel.aspx