Did The Nazis Have a School for Talking Dogs?

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“Milkbones, mein Fuhrer.”

Someone should have investigated David Berkowitz‘s neighbor’s dog, “Harvey”.

Via IO9:

Just when you think you’ve gotten to the end of the bizarre by-products of World War II, you learn about talking Nazi dogs. The question is: How official were they? We’ll look into the school — or possibly the con game — of talking dogs.

Here’s what we know. In 1930, Margarethe Schmidt lived with her mother in a relatively large house, and kept Asra, a Great Dane. Asra gave birth to five puppies, and the Schmidts took in a terrier. Somewhere along the line, all the dogs began learning to talk. And at some later point along the line, reports went out that these talking, spelling, and “reasoning,” dogs, would go out into the battlefields and the villages and start working for the Nazis.

The idea that dogs could talk was not unprecedented in Germany. In the 1920s, a dog named Don, that would bark his name, tell people he was hungry, and ask for “kuche,” became a celebrity and brought his owner a great deal of wealth. The Nazis harbored a sentimentality for animals, and a belief in the deep connection between humans and nature. Great Danes speaking German and helping their human comrades didn’t seem that crazy. This might be why German newspapers published plans for educated dogs taking over low-level command posts and helping out on the battlefields. One dog, Rolf, reportedly learned to spell with his paw. He spelled out his thoughts on religion – in between hitting on women and asking them if he could wag their tails. Margarethe Schmidt was referred to as an “animal psychologist,” in these pieces. Possible uses for the new educated dogs that she churned out were bandied about in the German power structure.

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  • kowalityjesus

    I guess its only fitting to be shown that dogs could be exalted to the level of humans, because it is already painfully evident that humans can be degraded to the level of dogs.

  • Reasor

    “Ruh-roh, Raggy,” said one veteran of the program when reached for comment.

  • American Cannibal

    Hey Hitler, leave those dogs alone

    • jasonpaulhayes

      No bark sarcasm in the classroom

      • American Cannibal

        We don’t need no leash control

        • jasonpaulhayes

          You! Yes, you behind the bike sheds, stand still Doggy!

          • American Cannibal

            run, puppy, run
            dig that hole, forget the sun

  • jasonpaulhayes

    Russia was training anti-tank dogs at the same time strapped with magnetic bombs. The fatal mistake was that the dogs were following their nose to detonate under Russian tanks even though they were trained on enemy tanks visually.

  • Liam_McGonagle

    Is it just me or does Hitler look like a parking lot attendant in that cheesey jacket?

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