River Of Blood Runs Through UK After Ink Spill

bloodToday’s sign of the impending apocalypse via the Northampton Chronicle and Echo:

An large ink spillage has been identified as the cause of why a river in Northampton turning red.

Following an investigation by the Environment Agency and Anglian Water, it is believed that the waterway near to the A43 in Moulton turned red last Thursday due to a quantity of red ink.

He said: “At first I thought something had died as it looked like blood but when it was all the way along we said it must have been a whale to create that much blood.

A spokesman for the Environment Agency said: “We have worked with Anglian Water to trace the source of the red colouration through the surface water drains.

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  • howiebledsoe

    Considering it’s the hometown of the band Bauhaus, it seems very fitting.

    • BrianApocalypse

      Also Alan Moore and the recent Clown epidemic. I’m sure these factors are all connected somehow.

  • Bob

    “A” goes before words that begin with consonants.

    a cat

    a dog

    a purple onion

    a buffalo

    a big apple

    A LARGE

    “An” goes before words that begin with vowels:

    an apricot

    an egg

    an Indian

    an orbit

    an uprising

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