Dead Indian Guru Cryogenically Frozen By Followers

guruIf only modern refrigeration technology had existed in the biblical era. Via the BBC:

Devotees of a dead guru in India have told the BBC they put his body in a freezer to preserve him as they believe he will return to life to lead them.

Thought to have been in his seventies, Ashutosh Maharaj was declared dead by authorities in Punjab on January 29. But, confident that he was merely in a state of deep meditation, his followers froze his corpse.

He led the Divya Jyoti Jagrati Sansthan (Divine Light Awakening Mission) which claims more than 30 million followers.

His spokesman Swami Vishalanand told the BBC that although doctors had declared Maharaj “clinically dead”, he was actually alive and in a state of samadhi, which is the highest plane of meditation.

The website of the Divya Jyoti Jagrati Sansthan says it was established in 1983 and aims to “achieve world peace”. It claims to have 350 branches in 15 countries.

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  • Hadrian999

    at first thought that pic was wonde rwoman cosplay

  • Gjallarbru

    Well, there’s a lack of education going on here, but it’s not what you might think.

    Yes, there’s a problem understanding what a dead body is, and how science has pretty much determined surefire ways to know if you’re dead. Surely, some education has been missing on that point.

    But, the bigger problem here is that if you are just meditating, and we freeze you, then you are definitly dead. If their guru wasn’t dead, he sure is now. Ice crystals destroying cell membranes will do that to a man. You know, like the expression “freezing to death”. Not to mention that when death by frost occurs, it’s not rigor mortis that sets in, you’re just frozen stiff, including your heart.

    Of course, people don’t usually freeze in India, so how could they have known. The country is pretty warm.

    • Rhoid Rager

      たまにお前は愚かなことをかく。

      • Gjallarbru

        The character of man is often shown by the way he chooses to behave. What I wrote, in jest, you saw as an opportunity to try and insult me. But since you lack courage to let all see your insult, you wrote so that few would actually know what you wrote. While on the web, none lack the conviction to openly insulting others, except you.

        You are declaring yourself as a man of weaker character than you first appeared. The fact that we did not see eye to eye before has now lead to a pityful behavior. Yet, you are certainly intelligent enough to do better. This isn’t becoming of your intelligence at all.

        • Rhoid Rager

          We all do things that are ‘unbecoming’ of the way we are expected to act. That’s the novelty of life. I enjoy the edge. There’s little point to cultivating a solid personality online; nor in real life for those with tenuous connections to one’s self.

          You *sometimes* write too much to say too little. It’s an aesthetic blemish. That’s what I wanted to communicate. I thought I would run you around a corner or two to find that out. Glad to see you enjoyed the run around enough to comment on it,

          • Gjallarbru

            Well, if that was your intent, then point taken. And, I will take you at your word.

            My tendency to “write to much” might be from my French upbringing. In French, succinct is usually not enough. In fact, during my studies, I was usually blamed for writing some “textes squelettiques”, or boney texts with no flesh. So I have taken the habit of “fleshing out” my text to satisfy my teachers. Obviously, that isn’t good in English…

          • Rhoid Rager

            Parfois je suis vache…

          • Gjallarbru

            Attention, “vache” varie en signification selon l’endroit. Au Québec, par exemple, vache ne serait utilisé que pour une femme. Un homme serait “chien”. “Vache” peut aussi avoir le sens de paresseux ou léthargique.

            Mais, je crois avoir saisie le sens voulu.

          • Rhoid Rager

            Schooled I am, indeed.
            Now I know where to come to correct my broken French.
            Until our swords cross again, Gjallarbru.

          • Jin The Ninja

            votre francais est formidable.
            francophone ou ecole d’immersion?
            quebecois ou continental?

          • Gjallarbru

            Québecois, francophone, qui se sent très attaché à sa langue et sa culture.

            Et merci pour le compliment!

          • Jin The Ninja

            ma famille maternelle est aussi quebecois/canadienne-francaise et je se sent tres attache/nostalgique a sa culture. mais je n’ecris pas bien en francais;)

          • Gjallarbru

            Toute maîtrise d’une habileté est une question de pratique. Si on n’a pas l’opportunité de pratiquer, il serait difficile d’être performant. Il faut parfois se donner les opportunités aussi.

            La lecture en français compensera votre faiblesse. Il n’y a aucun doute dans mon esprit qu’une lecture assidue de textes de qualité vous donnera l’exemple à suivre. Vous pourrez dès lors mieux écrire. Ne serait-ce que de lire les nouvelles sur canoe.ca ou d’autres sites, comme ceux de la France.

            Au plaisir!

  • Thurlow Weed

    Guru on the rocks, soon to become a popular drink in Mumbai.

  • Rhoid Rager

    gurusicle

  • Juan

    Thank you for the laugh:)

  • Echar Lailoken

    The hipsters will be doing this soon.

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