Powdered Alcohol Debuts

palcoholThis stuff is about as far from a single malt or cult cabernet as you can get, but sadly Palcohol is probably going to be more popular than either. SB Nation hails powdered alcohol’s potential to liven up boring sports games:

Trying to sneak booze is an American past time. Well, not THE American past time — but now there’s a way for you to sneak alcohol easily into your favorite sporting event! Heck, you don’t even need to use a syrup bottle.

Meet “Palcohol”

These are essentially Capri Suns for adults. A large, booze-filled pouch designed to turn every trip to Chuck E. Cheese into a party. This isn’t some pie-in-the-sky, wacky idea. This stuff has been approved!

It’s important to note that the powder can be used in drinks OR on food. So, who other than Spilly would be interested in this marvelous monstrosity? Palcohol has the answers.

2. Maybe you’re a college football fan. So many stadiums don’t even serve alcohol. What’s that about; watching football without drinking?! That’s almost criminal. Bring Palcohol in and enjoy the game.

Please keep this away from Tennessee Volunteers fans…

[continues at SB Nation]


Majestic is gadfly emeritus.

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33 Comments on "Powdered Alcohol Debuts"

  1. Powered alcohol? Yeah, I can see this ending well…

  2. Hmmm. Any bets on how long until some idiot teenage or something dies from snorting this or smoking it or something?

    • i’m suspecting it would burn too much when you snort it, and would just go up in flames if you tried to smoke it.

    • The Well Dressed Man | Apr 20, 2014 at 12:12 am |

      pretty hard to stop ethanol from being made… booze powder is pretty exotic though. if it turns out the binding substance is benign, i will rail the boozpowder and let yall know…. for science.

      • Binding substance is a derivative of sugar so looks like the experiment is on. Wouldn’t suggest doing a huge rail though cuz bypassing the liver with alcohol is much easier to get alcohol poisoning in far lower doses.

        • The Well Dressed Man | Apr 20, 2014 at 3:02 am |

          you’re a thoughtful egger-onner aaron. if it’s at all easily insufflated, i can imagine the consequences could be far worse than “bath salts”- which i also tried. for science. meh.

          • ¡¡¡SCIENCE!!!

            ( •_•)> ⌐■-■


          • The Well Dressed Man | Apr 21, 2014 at 2:33 am |

            It was poetry in motion. She blinded me with powdered methanol!

    • InfvoCuernos | Apr 20, 2014 at 12:37 am |

      Snorting is the first thing I thought of too.

  3. last i checked 100% alcohol was still a liquid. What is it actually made of?

    • Yea you are correct. Got this off Wikipedia….

      “According to food chemist Udo Pollmer of the European Institute of Food and Nutrition Sciences inMunich, alcohol can be absorbed in cyclodextrines, a sugar derivate. In this way, encapsuled in small capsules, the fluid can be handled as a powder. The cyclodextrines can absorb an estimated 60 percent of their own weight in alcohol.”

  4. I wasnt implying it should be illegal I was just pointing out the double standards our society has. I agree everything should be legal all drugs and whatever else you want to put in or do to your body. Im a firm believer of survival of the fittest and if you want to stick a needle in your arm and shoot up something than that is your choice but so are the consequences that go along with it.

    Also on a similar subject I think we need to stop coddling and protecting stupid people from themselves. I think we should remove all common sense warning labels like “caution hot” on a cup of hot coffee or whatever. The gene pool is polluted with bad genes of stupid people that we have saved from their own demise.

      • Haha the fact that people can sue for anything is just another part of the issue.

        Although I will admit that old lady did have some reason to sue because goddamn how fucking hot was the coffee to give her 3rd degree burns? Im surprised it didnt melt thru the cup in the first place.

        • the fact that people can sue for anything is just another part of the issue.

          I grok what you’re getting at, but I’m kind of more concerned about what people can’t sue for.

          The judicial system is the quickest way to fast track legislation, hence why it enshrines “property rights” and a “burden of proof”. Anyone with any illusions to the contrary need only remember the Dred Scott decision.

          • Oh i agree. We can sue for dumbshit but not other important stuff. The judicial system in this country broke a long time ago and is corrupted as any other branch of the government.

  5. Because alcohol isn’t lethal enough already is losing market share to the only semblance of a “black free market”, we’ve refined the weaponization process try our refreshing new way to get blitzed safely and legally©.

    • Echar Lailoken | Apr 19, 2014 at 10:55 pm |

      Pour a packet or two or a few into any drink or food product that’s good for you. Get blottoed below the radar! Try our new powdered alcohol… Coming soon to a market near you.

      • Semantics™

        the sad part is I would write copy if I were fairly compensated. not for this shit tho. ÿ can only tolerate so much bullshit.

  6. BuzzCoastin | Apr 19, 2014 at 9:51 pm |

    Cyborg booze has arrived

  7. Echar Lailoken | Apr 19, 2014 at 11:01 pm |

    Does Mother’s little helper need to keep out of sight? No need to worry about your little tike witnessing you spike your drink. Just pour a packet or two or a few of our patented powdered alcohol into any beverage or food item that’s good for you. Get blottoed below the radar.

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