Pop Culture Conspiracy: Is Snoop Dogg Faking It?

Snoop Dogg is one of America’s (and possibly the World’s) favorite stoners. Or should we say Alleged Stoners

The internet was abuzz with the story of Snoop being detained and piss tested in Sweden for suspicion of marijuana possession.

Dave's not here.

Dave’s not here.

Snoop (of course) claimed it was racial profiling. Profiling, maybe — racial? Not so much (See: Willie Nelson).

The Inquisitr has the gory details:

Snoop (real name: Calvin Cordozar Broadus) had just performed a concert in the Swedish city of Uppsala when police suspected he might have been under the influence of narcotics. It’s unclear whether or not Snoop was driving, but it doesn’t matter: under Swedish law, anyone suspected of being under the influence of drugs can be detained and forced to take a urine test.

And that’s exactly what happened to Snoop: cops put him into the back of a police car and brought him to the station. Police spokesperson Daniel Nilsson explained to the Local what went down.

“Police carrying out roadside controls noticed that Snoop Dogg (whose car was pulled over) seemed to be under the influence of narcotics. He was arrested and taken to the police station to take a urine test. The incident lasted several minutes. Once the test was carried out he left.”

Unlike some other European nations that have decriminalized marijuana — or at least, the police look the other way — Sweden has, since 1988, taken a “Zero Tolerance” approach to pot. And by some metrics, it appears to be working — the Scandinavian nation reports that pot use among its teens is among the lowest in Europe.

Typically, if one fails a drug test for marijuana in Sweden the punishment is a fine, based on income. But Snoop was not only released from custody, but he left without being fined, and in fact claimed he was innocent:

“Niggas got me in the back of police car right now in Sweden, cuz. Pulled a niggerr over for nothing, taking us to the station where I gotta pee in a cup for nothing. I ain’t did nothing. All I did was came to the country and did a concert. And now I gotta go to the police station, for nothing.”

For someone who claims to smoke 81 blunts a day, this flies in the face of all Marijuana Lore, as this infographic attests:

how-long-does-marijuana-stay

Maybe Snoop just gets really shitty weed. It happens.

This begs the question: did Snoop bribe some local official or has he been faking it all along?

Uppsala isn’t some rustic backwoods, so given the amount of press coverage and social media hand-wringing this seems unlikely, and it also seems likely that he would brag about paying off some corrupt local bureaucrat.

So how did he pass the urinalysis?

If he used some kind of detox or fake urine wouldn’t he also flip the script, as the kids say, and if not outright promote this wonder product, at least give XYZ brand fake pee some well-earned respect?

Needless to say, Snoop (according to Snoop) left Sweden guns weed blazin’:

“2 all my sweden fans U can blame YA police dept for never seeing me again in your beautiful country…. And I’m still smokin.”

We believe you, Snoop, we really do.

Incognito Chupacabra

World renowned Secret Agent Rock Star Astronaut Gynecologist.
Probably more deserving of the title Polymath than anyone from either the 20th or 21st centuries (or the 25th for that matter). Best known for his work fronting the Brutal Swedish Black Metal From Sweden Black Metal Band, Traumatic Insemination, and their chart destroying metal hit 'Transvaginal Mosh' not to mention the Alt-country crossover smash, 'Hellbound and Down'. Currently in the studio working on their 13th album, a rock opera based on the 1974 Sean Connery blockbuster 'Zardoz' tentatively titled ' Exterminate the Brutals (Penises everywhere)'. Author of the seminal work on Internet Bios and Resume Writing, 'Imaginary Triumphs of the Will'. First person to solve a LeMarchand's Cube in less than a minute. He is currently working on his PHA* in Medieval Metaphysics at Miskatonic University Online.
*Pretty Helly Awesome.

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