It’s Christmas time! Which means the Right will soon be rolling out the tired meme of a supposed “War on Christmas” along with talk of how far we’ve fallen as a nation. Funny, they get so adamant about it you’d think they were trying to sell you something.
Yes, praise Santa, that jolly old elf directly created by a Coca-Cola advertising campaign. It doesn’t take a Jungian nor an advertising exec to see the symbolic appeal for consumerist excess: Santa’s suit is red, a color consistently shown to make us more emotional and excited; his mythic tradition is so socially engrained in our culture even die-hard atheists, who would normally laugh at such a figure, gleefully get in on the fun as they buy products awash in Santa symbolism; Santa bestows “gifts” on “good people”(who among us does not self-identify as “good?”) in a ritual replicated by parents, both secular and religious, creating an early childhood identification of “happiness” with consumer products.
“Well, that may be true, but we all know Santa doesn’t exist.” Well, that sure does seem like alot of psychical energy being thrown towards something that “doesn’t exist.”
“Oh come on now, all those kids and parents of the world feeding the god-form of Santa psychic energy, love, affection and cookies in a worldwide ritual every year… who gives a damn bout the elves? We all know where the real money is, and every year he delivers, avatars spread across the entire suburban hell of the San Gabriel Valley, invoked in a ritual every Christmas eve, parents assuming the quietness, swiftness and good will in a yearly sacred invocation. Santa lives, whether invoked unconsciously by the parental magi or not!”
Even the most embittered Christmas warrior never seems to have a problem with Santa, in fact using his continual existence as evidence that the war is not yet over, that Christmas is not yet finished. From a website devoted to the “War on Christmas” meme comes this little gem:
“In perhaps one of the only legitimate beefs(Freudian slip here?) in the so-called ‘war on Christmas’ it appears the good guys actually won one. Malls across the country have attempted to capitalize on the Santa business by installing what they call “the Santa adventure” and charging parents fees from $35 to $50 just to get their children in to see Santa Claus. In the most high profile of these cases Cherry Hill Mall near Philadelphia famous imposed the charges and then faced a brutal customer backlash that went viral on social media. The mall has since made Santa a free attraction, as he has been in the past.”
That’s right, the victory for the “good guys” was won not against Santa usurping the role of prime Christmas figure or the decline of Christianity in the West, it was over children being allowed to see the walking embodiment of a Coca-Cola ad for consumer capitalism and whether they’d have to pay for it.
Dr. Bones is an 8 year practitioner of the Southern occult tradition known as Conjure, Rootwork, and Hoodoo. A skilled card-reader and Spiritworker, Dr. Bones has undertaken all aspects of the work, both benevolent and malefic. Politically he holds the Anarchist line that “Individuality can only flourish where equality of access to the conditions of existence is the social reality. This equality of access is Communism.” He resides in the insane State of Florida with his loving wife, a herd of cats, and a house full of spirits.
He can be reached through facebook and at email@example.com