Let’s be honest, we as Americans really don’t like each other. So let’s make this an amicable breakup. Let’s end the USA. Americans are not happy with each other, whether we are talking political parties, economic statuses, racial lines, sexual orientations, etc etc. I know I don’t like most of you. Lets try again for utopia. Each ideological fiefdom in this great country has its own vision of utopia and it doesn’t include most of their fellow citizens. These immovable visions have erupted into a silent civil war. Did you notice that civil war? It is happening all around you in America. Let’s take a brief look at some of the main warring factions that will never be able to peacefully coexist.
All War is Vocabulary
The Absolutists: They are the gatekeepers of vocabulary. Vocabulary is the secret signal identifying whether or not you adhere to the ever-moving cause du jour. Sexuality and race are favorites of these vernacular ninjas. If there is any public display of vocabulary violation there is an immediate admonishment akin to a puritanical shunning. If need be, there is a wing of this group that can turn very physical.
The Old School: This group name is not an age appropriation, rather it’s more of a gut term. They are the most obvious group because they care not for the movement of vocabulary. In fact, they abhor any movement at all. (This is an observation, not a judgment.) They have no time for delicate sensibilities when the enemy is a dynamic socio-political substance that can take many forms. A striking characteristic of this group is a deep yearning for an America that never existed. If need be, there is a wing of this group that can turn very physical.
Vocabulary: are you part of us, or part of the others?
Soccer Fans: The most annoying of the warring factions. A metrics-driven little cohort. Where did you go to college? What part of town do you live in? Where do your children go to school? (No children?!) How many square feet do you own? How many bathrooms? Do you have the latest in countertop technology? Of course, none of this is asked outright. It is all about the dynamics of the vocabulary war. All these questions are expressed in genteel terms such as, “Tell me about your background, tell me a little about yourself.” That, boys and girls, is code for “Did you go to a better college than me? Do you make more money than me? Are my kids better than yours?” Add them all up, and the sum total of all of the questions is – “are you good enough for me?” If need be, this group outsources physicality to police and mall cops.
This list could go on for days. By my count, there are at least a dozen versions of the perfect America. Most are not compatible with the other and will never be. Eventually something is going to give. A paramilitary state? Anarchy?
There will be no armistice between these groups, or the countless others not named. So let’s end the charade. Our interests only temporarily coincide when the “enemies” we created by hundreds of years of oppression make their way to our shores. I’m talking about everything from non state-sponsored terrorism, to the scrambled Middle East, (which, by the way, is resulting in cascading population dislocation). Let’s not forget the rise of China with a well-earned chip on its shoulder. It’s pretty obvious all will never be forgiven, nor should it. So let’s kill the beast. Let’s kill the war machine that created this mess.
Our much-demonized economic overlords (see – Illuminati, Bilderberg, Wall Street, Bank of International Settlements, whatever) could get behind this idea and increase revenue by a better targeting of brands. A balkanized America could be better managed by a multinational plutocracy. Make no excuses, a multinational plutocracy already rules you.
America is a derivative. It’s an artificial edifice that has no natural claim to its land or people. It’s a quilt, sewn together out of the stupidity of its enemies. America is a Frankenstein, lurching onward, consuming, stomping.
Don’t rely on your vote, either. The Trump debacle and the RNC’s pathetic attempts at denying the voters their will by ballot (no matter how flawed the candidate) shows that the rock-solid thing that has been hammered into our heads since grade school civics class – THE VOTE – is really nothing more than an illusion. Wars were fought for it, the suffrage movement, the civil rights movement: all of it for the vote, all of it for something that doesn’t really exist. If Trump gets the majority of primary voters, and that baffling feat is able to be subverted by backdoor party bosses like Curly Haugland, who even said that your vote doesn’t count, then the illusion is dispelled. Your vote truly doesn’t count. (And seriously, who is named Curly Haugland? He sounds like Boss Hog’s tailor.) And to the Democrats, don’t think there aren’t backdoor party rules that can do the same thing: toss your vote if the party bosses aren’t pleased with your choices.
Without the vote, what are we? Looks to me like we’re just a bunch of assholes standing around believing in a delusion, all the while seething with hatred towards one another.
America is the equivalent of a bloated Elvis in a bedazzled jumpsuit, sweating and wheezing through its last hoorah, praying for the pain meds to kick in. So let’s do our last bit of civic duty and let’s kill the idol, let’s kill Elvis before he has a chance to leave the building and die on a toilet.
Let’s salute the flag one last time. And then burn it.
Fuck the USA
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