A Planet of Magic Socks

If you even have a peripheral interest in the UFO topic, then you are probably aware that the entire UFO community are having a collective freak-out due to the recent headlines in major news concerning a secretly funded program that the government has actually admitted to. If you haven’t read the New York Times article, go there now and join us UFOnauts in our joyful exuberance. Many in the not so hallowed halls of the flying saucer society are using the term “disclosure,” in reference to this admission from the Pentagon, but just how much are really disclosing? What if it is rumored that I am able to float around my house wearing a pair of magic socks, yet when asked about them, I deny this regularly. What if someone takes a fuzzy picture of some glowing socks and I eventually admit that that is indeed the magical footwear in question. How much have I really said about the socks? There would and should be an avalanche of questions about them: Where did I find them, how do they work, do they only come in white and how and when can everybody else have a pair. Now that we know that the Government has been sitting on this information for a long time, I see no reason to believe that they are going to be spilling the rest of the magic beans anytime soon, though I would love to be proven wrong.

There has been much speculation in both the realm of fiction and in consensus reality about how much intervention might be going on from the “others.” There are some hearty assumptions being made about highly evolved beings with technological advancements and to what degree they are, or even could guide us away from the dangerous precipice of our own follies. As of late there have been many theories bandied about in regards to what unseen hands may be at work, guiding humanity and helping us navigate our self inflicted tragedies for centuries. Some of these ideas may well be true, however, lets discuss some of the realistic obstacles that these guiding hands might need to overcome in order to shape the Earth toward a new and improved tomorrow.

Of all the postulations that I have encountered in speaking with people on this topic, the most common one seems to be the “ancient masters” theory. It usually goes something like this: A great religious leader from the past, (insert your fave here) was actually an emissary from outer space and was given a message for mankind. I guess it is possible that some or even all of these spiritual figures were contacted by intergalactic sages, however, it seems to me that using religion to influence humans would probably not be the most efficient way to advance mankind. Religions have traditionally sprung up as localized manifestations and really do not have a great track record for peacefully spreading to other regions. Over time whatever peaceful messages they may have initially had are transformed, mistranslated and generally perverted into whatever directive the local power structure needs for control of the populace or resources.

Let us pretend for a moment that you are part of an alien team given the task of herding the planet Earth into a more enlightened future and you have several millennium to accomplish this goal. Given the theological history of mankind would religion really be an effective way to go about this daunting task? It appears to me that it would not because eventually one would find themselves trapped alongside information age humans who maintain a value system that represents bronze age values and goals, in other words, children with atom bombs. The wrathful God of yore that may have been perfectly suitable for dessert dwelling nomads surrounded by warlike tribes, might create a completely dysfunctional society a thousand years later. Even if you were able to throw off some of the shackles of the ancient religion, in the same way the west did during it’s eighteenth century age of enlightenment, it would take centuries and possibly cause conflict in a million unforeseeable ways.

So if religion doesn’t work, how about a political solution for mankind’s upgrade to Earth 2.0? This could prove to be a thorn from the same bush if we were to take but a fleeting look at history once again. The twentieth century is ripe with examples of highly intelligent people doing very horrible things in the name of political ideology. If we thought that the religious wars of the previous centuries were bad, (and indeed they were) we were unprepared for what humans were capable of in the name of philosophy. The first flying machine was launched at the start of the twentieth century and in less than 80 years we had landed on the moon. Certainly humans had made enormous technological and medical progress, and yet this was the same century that killed more people than humans ever had, and did it in such a astonishingly short amount of time. We often arrogantly assume that we have finally found a political system that addresses concerns for each of us and that it seems obvious,( to ourselves anyway) that if only it were adopted by the masses, everyone could benefit from it’s sublime truth.

After 9/11, the United States invaded Afghanistan and decided that it needed to install a new and improved government. We arrogantly assumed that we could replace a thousand odd years of tribalism with an imposed Jeffersonian democracy. America was, in fact, the wealthiest country on Earth with the most powerful military and had access to some of the greatest minds on the planet, therefore, if anyone could accomplish this astounding feat it should be the United States. We assumed the same thing in Iraq shortly afterwards and in both cases the results fell far short of expectations.

My point here is not to dismiss the idea that we are being guided towards a better world by shrouded light beings from the Crab Nebula; that is entirely possible and I feel that there is mounting evidence that we are not alone in the universe. It is my assertion rather, that we often project assumed abilities on others that may or may not be realistic. Just as we sometimes assume wrongly that smart people will do smart things and religious people will act morally, we can not assume that the aliens will necessarily have any idea how to fix our planet. Take the territorial issues that we face on a country-wide level and apply them on a planetary scale and then try to come up with a bold, sophisticated and enduring way to ensure growth and improvement among the hairless apes while also ensuring that they don’t kill each other in the process.

The sad reality of our humanity has been that even if benevolent visitors find a way to give all of the monkeys plenty of bananas, a few of them are just smart and selfish enough to figure out a way to undo any altruism that might be set in motion. How can we assume that even if there is a civilization with the remarkable ability to cross the galaxy or bend reality, that they will automatically know what the heck to do with us. It is entirely possible that we are a uniquely difficult species and that the only way to change us for the better is to wait it out, even if that means thousands of years of watching us throw rocks at each other. It is a feeling that I have, that the universe only speaks to us on the level that we understand. Just as we need to wait for a child to mature before discussing deep philosophy or advanced concepts, perhaps there are those who await humanity’s post pubescence for some heavy conversations of our own.

Belvedere Swizzlestick
Belvedere Swizzlestick

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