Okay, before initiating this odd encounter with an unknown higher intelligence that I’m about to relay, I should first point out that this didn’t just randomly happen. I’d been feeling sick and because of that had spent a couple of days in deep meditation leading up to this weirdness, which is a practice I’ve taken up in the last few years. When an illness is draining me I just sort of ride the wave and turn inwardly for extended periods, which is a nice luxury to be able to indulge in if you can, the other side effect being you get better way faster. So this contact encounter dream came at the tail and of at least two straight days of far more focused inner exploration than usual.
In it, I find myself in my grandparent’s former house in the Columbia gorge with my wife and we perform a strange summoning ritual near the game room in the basement. Later we’re upstairs and I can suddenly tell that something is amiss below. I can feel it somehow, so I head down to check it out but when I do I have no clue what I’m encountering. It’s like a small micro black hole floating in the middle of the room that emanates outwardly. I’m inside of this black energy, but it’s also the entirety of the room. The energy is eminently menacing and ultimately far more intense than I can handle, which is a problem because it’s now a part of my entire reality.
I head back upstairs to my wife to escape the sensation and inform her that we’ve got to promptly get the fuck out of there. Suddenly, somehow, we’ve left. We’re now living in what appear to be separate dorm rooms. She calls me from her new place to tell me we haven’t escaped. I come over and the entity has clearly followed her. I track it to her spare room and it then bursts forth into her bedroom but it’s more translucent this time, breaking from it’s formerly obsidian visage. My consciousness distorts and now I’m looking down on it from above her bed. “I’m going to kiiiilll allll yourrr frrriennds!” it creepily hiss growls at me in slow motion, yet in this case I entirely realize it’s talking about her friends.
“Fuuuuck!” I think to myself but I also manage to pull myself back into a somewhat normal mindframe, now outside of its grasp. When I do I’m quite hilariously like: “Well, that’s freaky as shit and I have no idea what to do about it really, have fun with that, I’m out.” Except that the second I get back to my place the entire environment is now possessed. Black tendrils start protruding from the ceiling which compel me to turn around. On my back wall I have all these pictures of my college friends (in real life I have no idea who these people are). Suddenly translucent syringe fingers appear in front of the photographs and stab their way into their faces seductively. The whole wall is now a throbbing hellish fuckfest of narcotic slave consciousness.
It’s all so aesthetically fiendish that it ultimately tips me off to the fact that I’m dreaming. With this knowledge I consciously will myself out of the realm I’m locked into and go through the eternally head trippy experience of now waking up in another completely different dream, losing lucidity and again unaware that I’m dreaming. I then get out of bed in this surreal state and I’m back in my grandparent’s house. I can see the black portal of energy still lurking behind the scenes, but now it’s completely manageable. Doesn’t seem threatening at all, it’s just there, concentrated in portal form but also mildly a part of the fundamental essence of everything that surrounds me. As I’m pondering this my dog walks into the visionary room to lick my face. Then I wake up.
Instantly I’m in what in the absolute fuck contemplation mode. More to the point, I somehow know it can’t be a positive omen for the immediate future. I’ve been in this territory before. Often potent disbursements of dark psi energy are accompanied by unpleasant real world grotesqueries. I go the entire day without incident though until that evening when I go out to dinner with my wife. She’s had a horrible week and drinks one more glass of wine than normal. I can’t even remember the last time she’s done this.
Suddenly I’m getting angrily yelled at in the car. She can be a pissed off drunk but to her credit, she hasn’t been like this in years. It’s not a common occurrence at all. Like I said, she had a really shitty week. It happens from time to time, but typically not right after I have a dream about summoning otherworldly black portal entities.
The next morning in meditation I’m again contemplating the complexity of the dream (which is something I’m prone to). For one, it’s playing off the Twin Peaks: The Return ending, which I honestly wasn’t a fan of even though I think the show is still probably the best ever on television despite the intentional ambiguity there. I just think Lynch got a bit predictable with his endings and the whole thing is far too similar to his last like 5 films. I want more Mark Frost in that shit I suppose.
Or maybe I don’t. I probably haven’t mentioned this before, but there was a time many years back when my wife and I had far more relationship issues in addition to consuming way more alcohol than we currently do, and because of that got into a fair amount of creepy drunken yelling matches. For a bit, I wouldn’t say I was seriously thinking about leaving her but, how would I put it? Well, at one point while at band practice we did some smoke, beer, and nitrous oxide based auditory rituals. After one of these exercises in semi-calculated sonic time distortion, something got in. A dark multi-faceted shadow creature broke into my mind through the cracks in the corners of perception. I’m not even getting excessively poetic with the description there. In the far out depths of this nitrous trance it felt exactly like this black mist being comprised from boundless art propelled itself into our realm from the south west corner of our Capitol Hill practice space. Then it near instantaneously darted into my soul and merged with my spirit. I’d pushed myself a bit too far out, something saw the opening and cleverly jolted in. I felt like I was under attack for roughly a week and a half after that. In my meditational states I was told quite specifically that I was being “tested”.
This maybe culminated in me getting suddenly quite lost in a bus trancendental meditation session one afternoon on my way home from work. Out of nowhere I found myself in a brief but incredibly profound dream state where I became absolutely convinced I had to leave my wife. I pulled out of it still persuaded for like ten minutes before I finally shook the notion off. What the fuck? It genuinely felt like a malicious entity trying to plant ideas in my head. Later that night I went out to a show at a DIY venue up the street. I ran into this music journalist I only sort of know and the first words out of his mouth were: “You should really leave your wife.” I was completely taken aback by this because again, I don’t know the dude that well and it was just such a random first thing to say to a person you hadn’t seen in a while. As I found out, it had to do with him witnessing a few girls ask me to dance at a show a week or so prior and me drunkenly complying. I was just dancing because they asked but I could see where he was coming from. Why not be single right? So weird though. The exact thing that invaded my meditational states manifesting in real world words out of fucknowhere on the same day. These things aren’t coincidental. First rule of sorcery: all consciousness is connected.
I eventually shook off whatever this was and passed the “test”, but here it all is again in a dream state years later, from a completely different angle. Of course our issues were far more complicated than I have the time or the desire to get into here, but I’m being shown how disastrous both our lives would have gone if I’d failed that particular examination.
As I’m being told in this ganj-i-tation sesh, the metaphors in the vision ring deeper than I’ll probably ever comprehend, but I get some of it. It was about how my wife saved me from myself and vice versa. It’s obviously playing off the ending to Twin Peaks so that’s another clue, and much like in the Twin Peaks-a-verse, evil is often associated with shitty drugs. I’m pretty sure that’s the lost highway both my wife and I would have ended up on if it wasn’t for one another, and quite possibly if I’d broken it off. Remember that she drunkenly yelled at me for the first time in ages the very day I had this particular dream. The dark energy isn’t gone entirely (and I’m not sure it ever will be) but it’s totally manageable now. My desire to do pills at this point in my life is pretty much non-existent and I used to love that synthetic deep relaxation shit.
Strange magick willed the two of us together, which I’ve written about extensively at this point (it’s half of what my first book is about really).
We were married in my Grandparent’s house, which is where the dream started and ended. While in a trance I’m told the daemon entity we summoned represents “yin energy”. To say I’ve spent most of my life possessed with too many ideas to ever effectively channel into reality would be an understatement. That kind of perpetual freak energy combined with a boring day job can drive a person to look for any means to dull the pace and narrow the scope of their thoughts. Booze and pills can do that, but there’s always a horrific blowback if you go too far in that direction.
Spoilers for Twin Peaks follow the Return so stop if you haven’t seen it:
And like in the ending to The Return, I jumped from one reality to another. Except in my alternate realm, I passed. I never tried to save my wife like Cooper tried to save Laura. She helped me save myself and I then helped empower her to do the same. In this new world, the dark swirling portal was still a part of everything, always lurking just behind the boundaries of conscious perception, except this time there was nothing menacing about it, the balance between chaos and order (dark and light) was perfectly preserved by the love of a dog.
If you’re curious, you can listen to me tell this story right after it happened in podcast form below:
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