Author Archive | Matt Staggs

Consumer Reports Campaigns to Ban Use Of ‘Natural’ On Food Labels

"Botfly Larvae: An All-Natural Source For Your Recommended Daily Allowance of Nightmare Fuel" Pic - Geoff Gallice (CC)

“Botfly Larvae: An All-Natural Source For Your Recommended Daily Allowance of Nightmare Fuel” Pic – Geoff Gallice (CC)

Consumer Reports states that most people believe that products labeled “natural” are better for them. The watchdog organization would like to see the use of it banned.

The claim “natural,” which is stamped on countless food labels, is widely misunderstood by consumers, according to a new a survey of 1,000 people from the Consumer Reports National Research Center. Nearly 60 percent of people look for the term when they shop for food, probably because they think the products labeled natural are better for them than products without that claim.

About two-thirds believe it means a processed food has no artificial ingredients, pesticides, or genetically modified organisms, and more than 80 percent believe that it should mean those things.

The reality is that the Food and Drug Administration hasn’t developed a formal definition for the term.

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Man Claims To Have Spent 17 Years Protecting Secret Martian Colony

Space Marines tasked with defending a top secret human colony hidden in a Martian crater against hostile insectoid and reptilian lifeforms? Suicide missions to retrieve ancient alien artifacts? Believe me, no one wants this to be true more than I do, but…

I may just swipe the entire setting for the next time I play Stars Without Number.

Someone with better math skills than me (which means practically anyone) calculate if it would even be physically possible to transport 1,000 combat troops on a craft 150 feel long and 450 feet wide. How am I supposed to believe this proud veteran’s tale of battling Martians for Uncle Sam if the math doesn’t add up?

Audio Interview with Captain K here.

The Marine, who calls himself “Captain K” and whose identity is unknown, explained that he was recruited for the secret mission after his super-soldier training. According to his story, once he reached the “Lunar Operations Command,” he was given a contract that obligated him to a 20-year service tour on Mars.

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Indian Company Offers Water Purifier For Vegetarians

Prestige LifeStraw (C - TKK Prestige)

Prestige LifeStraw (C – TKK Prestige)

Vegetarians, your worries are over: A new device is promised to remove almost all of the microorganisms from your drinking water.  The TKK Prestige LifeStraw SA is available directly from the manufacturer for 500 or a little more than $8/€6. A quick tip before you pull out that credit card: Many commercial water filters already do the same thing. Just get a Sharpie and write “vegetarian” on the side of your pitcher. Voila.

Bangalore, May 29, 2014: India’s No 1 kitchen appliances company, TTK Prestige, enters into the dynamic market of water purifiers. This launch is in line with the expanding portfolio of innovative products by TTK Prestige Ltd. The trusted brand of generations, has partnered with Lifestraw SA, a renowned Swiss company for providing the state of art technology for the water purifier.

This is a non-electric gravity based water Purifier that provides one with Vegetarian water as it removes upto 99.9999% Bacteria, Virus and 99.99% Protozoan cysts.

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Pair Jailed For Attacking Edinburgh Mosque With Bacon



They’re muslims, not vampires, and that’s bacon, not garlic, you fascist dimwits. The porcine projectiles were lobbed by a man and woman associated with the Scottish Defence League, itself associated with far-right organization the English Defence League. Bacon belongs in frying pans and on plates, not mosque windows. They should give them a few extra months for wasting delicious foodstuffs.

Douglas Cruikshank, 39, and 18-year-old Chelsea Lambie threw bacon at the window of Edinburgh’s Central Mosque and wrapped the meat around door handles on January 31 last year.

Edinburgh Sheriff Court heard they and a third offender were associated with the Scottish Defence League, prosecutors said.

Wayne Stilwel, 25, from Gorebridge, Midlothian, previously admitted his involvement and was sentenced to 10 months in September.

Cruikshank, from Galashiels in the Borders, and Lambie, from Paisley, Renfrewshire, were convicted of threatening and abusive behaviour following a trial.

The trial heard that a man who was inside the mosque praying on the morning of the attack heard something hitting the prayer room window.

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American Exchange Student In Germany Gets Rescued From Giant Vagina Sculpture

"My art has been commended as strongly vaginal." (Pic: Twitter)

“My art has been commended as strongly vaginal.” (Pic: Twitter)

An “unidentified man” (I’m sure he’s identified to hell and back at this point if you really want to go looking, I don’t.) became trapped inside a giant sculpture of a vagina. Firefighters were called. Pictures were taken. Next time, try a little foreplay first.

An American exchange student was saved by firefighters after getting stuck inside a giant sculpture of a vagina.

The unidentified man reportedly climbed into the marble artwork in Tubingen, Germany, on Friday as part of a dare.

But, once inside, he found he couldn’t get out.

Five fire trucks and 22 firefighters were needed to help slide the man — who’d become lodged in by his legs — to freedom.

via American student rescued after getting stuck in giant vagina sculpture in Germany – NY Daily News.

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Slime Mold Colony Intelligence Explored In New Documentary ‘The Creeping Garden’

“A real life science fiction movie exploring a world creeping right beneath our feet, where time and space are magnified and intelligence redefined.

The Creeping Garden is a feature length creative documentary exploring the work of fringe scientists, mycologists and artists, and their relationship with the extraordinary plasmodial slime mould.”

The Creeping Garden – Trailer 2014 from cinema iloobia on Vimeo.

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Teddy Roosevelt Responsible For Piranha’s Bloodthirsty Reputation

"Like you wouldn't have thought the same thing, you lily-livered scalawag."

“Like you wouldn’t have thought the same thing, you lily-livered scalawag.”

I can’t say that I’d lay all the blame on Roosevelt: Roger Corman has to shoulder his fair share, too. Gruesome story, though.


In 1913, the former president made a much-ballyhooed trip down the Brazilian Amazon. Like anyone hosting a dignitary, the locals wanted to put on a show for Roosevelt. So days before the roughrider arrived, they used nets to block off a section of the Amazon. Then they caught piranhas from other parts of the river and tossed them into their makeshift aquarium, all while keeping the fish unfed. When Roosevelt rolled into town, the locals finally appeased their captives by chucking a live cow into the water. The piranhas wasted no time. As they sank their teeth into the meat, the water foamed up and turned red. In minutes, the cow’s skeleton was all that was left.

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Rock N’ Roll Samizdat: Soviet Era Bootleg Records Pressed From X-Ray Film

xrayLaughing Squid shares several remarkable examples of Soviet era audio samizdat. Neat stuff. Kind of spooky looking, too. Click through the link below to see the rest.

With vinyl scare and various western music genres like rock and roll and jazz banned in 1950s Soviet Russia, enterprising music fans would create records using X-ray film discarded by doctors and hospitals. The records were cut with scissors — often unevenly — with a cigarette hole burned through the middle of the platter and the music itself pressed onto the film using a special recording device. The result is a “multimedia” record that, when held up to light, reveals the skeletal structure left over from the film’s original use.

via A Series of Banned Rock and Jazz Records Pressed Onto Discarded X-Rays in 1950s Soviet Russia.

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Beaver Attacks And Pulls Man Off Of A Kayak

718px-Beaver_(CC)I’d say that this was like something out of a Roger Corman movie, but I think even he has his limits. Apparently, nature does not.

Rochester, N.Y. – A beaver jumped out of Irondequoit Creek and attacked a man in a kayak, knocking him into the water last Tuesday.

The victim, Michael Cavanaugh of Lima, N.Y. is recovering after being treated in the hospital for bite wounds on his back and deep puncture wounds on his arm. He is also being treated for rabies as a precaution.

BayCreek Paddling Center trainer Nate Reynolds saw part of the attack.

“I heard my name called out from the shop and I ran out the door to see a guy getting pulled into the water,” Reynolds said, describing the attack. “It was like watching a horror film.”

Reynolds said Cavanaugh was able to get to his feet and approach the dock, but the beaver would not let go of him, so Reynolds hit the beaver with a nearby paddle several times.

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