Author Archive | Sonny Liston

Bank Robbery: Why Crime Doesn’t Really Pay

Writes Thomas H. Maugh II on the LA Times Science Now:

Crime doesn’t pay, at least not very well, when it comes to robbing banks, a new study finds. With unprecedented access to financial data from British banks, economists have shown that bank robbers don’t make a lot of money, certainly not enough to justify the risks involved in such an armed robbery.

“The return on an average bank robbery is, frankly, rubbish,” the researchers wrote in the statistics journal Significance. “It is not unimaginable wealth.” It is so low, in fact, that it is not financially worthwhile for banks to install screens that could further reduce robberies.

Economist Neil Rickman of the University of Surrey and his colleagues were given unusual access to financial data from the British Bankers’ Assn. Such data about robberies are not normally disclosed to the public because it is commercially sensitive and could potentially encourage copycat robbers. Treating bank robbery as a business like any other, they used normal statistical measures to calculate profitability…

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Europeans Decide Greece Is the Laziest, Most Incompetent Nation in the EU (Greece Disagrees!)

We invented Democracy (with a capital “D”). Writes Derek Thompson in the Atlantic:

Greece is the hardest-working country in the EU! According to Greece. And only Greece.

According to Britain, Germany, Spain, Poland, and the Czech Republic, it’s the laziest country in Europe.

Meanwhile, Germany is the most respected EU country, according to the Pew Global report, European Unity on the Rocks. And Greece appears to be living in a bizarro universe where 78% of its respondents held negative views of Germany. Three in five Greeks said their country had Europe’s hardest working citizens. Half of the rest of the respondents from the other seven nations said Greece had the laziest workforce in Europe…

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Americans’ Heads Getting Bigger In Size And Changing Shape

Writes Jacqueline Howard on the Huffington Post:

Did the 20th century make us big-headed? Maybe so, since forensic anthropologists at the University of Tennessee in Knoxville found that white Americans’ heads are getting bigger and bigger … in size, that is.

The researchers studied about 1,500 skulls that dated from the mid-1800s through the 1980s. They noticed that the skulls gradually became larger, taller, and narrower. As a result, faces have become longer.

“The surprising thing is the skull size increase has not been documented in modern Americans,” researcher Dr. Richard Jantz told the Huffington Post. “We might have suspected that that was happening but this documents it … The shape of the skull has also changed rather dramatically. In fact, shape change has been more dramatic than size change.”…

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Human Foot Mailed to Canadian Governmental Headquarters

Conservative Party Of CanadaReports the AP via the Guardian:

A human foot has been mailed to the headquarters of Canada’s Conservative party and another body part discovered when police intercepted a second suspicious package, according to police in Ottawa, the national capital.

Police were called shortly after a receptionist opened a blood-soaked box at the headquarters of prime minister Stephen Harper’s party. The first officers to arrive saw what appeared to be bloodstains on the package and immediately called in hazardous material specialists. They opened it outside and found the foot.

Police said the package was addressed to the Conservative party of Canada and not a specific person. Harper’s office is not located at the party headquarters.

As the investigation developed Ottawa police said on Tuesday night that they had intercepted a second suspicious package containing another human body part…

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Florida Police Kill Naked Man as He Chews on Another Man’s Face

Illustration: Jrewald2000 (CC)

Illustration: Jrewald2000 (CC)

Via CBS Miami:

Miami police are still tight-lipped about the man they shot and killed on the MacArthur Causeway Saturday afternoon, but new details back claims they had no choice: the naked man they shot was trying to chew the face off another naked man, and refused to obey police orders to stop his grisly meal, which one source now claims included his victim’s nose and eyeballs.

Surveillance video taken from security cameras at the nearby Miami Herald building show a police officer arrive on the scene, appear to be startled by the spectacle of two naked men lying on the street, and draw his service weapon. It appears that the officer shot one of the men, but it was difficult to tell in the video.

The bizarre shooting happened shortly after 2 p.m., when police responded to a 911 call about two naked men fighting on a bike path along the Causeway, which was packed with traffic on a busy holiday weekend…

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Now You Have Two Ways To Go Blind … Lazer Tits!

LazerTitsAccording to the movers & shakers of the internets, this is the new trend sweeping the web …

You are forewarned, I am not responsible for blindness resulting from viewing of these (many NSFW) pics. LazerTits says:

For centuries the female bosom has been wrongfully held in the prison of maternal duty and manboy motor-boating … It’s time to get ZAPPED!!!!

What will YOU say when your kids ask where you were during the revolution? Don’t burn your bra, BLAST IT!!!

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New Zealand Student Sells Virginity for $45,000

Via abc.au.net:

A cash-strapped New Zealand student who auctioned off her virginity to help pay for university said she had accepted an offer of $NZ45,000 to sleep with a stranger.

The 19-year-old offered her virginity to the highest bidder in an online auction and said there had been more than 1,200 bids. “I have accepted an offer in excess of $45,000, which is way beyond what I dreamed,” the student said on her web page when the auction ended.

“Thank you to the more than 30,000 people who viewed my ad and to the more than 1,200 offers made.” Calling herself “unigirl”, the young woman had described herself as attractive, fit and healthy and said she had never been in a sexual relationship.

She did not respond to media requests for an interview but the proprietor of the website, Ross MacKenzie, told the Waikato Times newspaper he had been authorised to confirm the transaction.

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Rush Limbaugh: I Don’t Even Want To Be Alive Anymore

Via The Onion:

I know there are a lot of people out there who are upset about some of the things I’ve been saying on my radio program lately. My comments about the situation in Haiti have hurt and angered many Americans who genuinely care about the plight of the Haitian people, and that hurt and anger will likely never go away. Many of you are probably wondering, “What would compel a human being to say things like that?” Well, here’s your answer: I am a very bad person. And, to tell you the truth, I don’t really want to be alive anymore.

Try to look at it from my point of view. I have no reason to live. In my 59 years, I’ve made millions of dollars, built a veritable media empire, and accomplished virtually everything that a man of my limited imagination and worldview could possibly accomplish. And yet, at this point, in no way could you refer to what I’m doing as “living,” exactly.

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John Edwards Has a Sex Tape

First, finally admits the illegitimate kid, now this. Via Gawker:

JohnEdwardsSources have told us that, in the throes of their affair, John Edwards and Rielle Hunter made a sex tape that contains “several sex acts.” And that his aide, Andrew Young found it on an unmarked DVD.

The tape, say both our sources, is explicit and reveals that Edwards “is physically very striking, in a certain area. Everyone who sees it says ‘whoa’. She’s behind the camera at first.”

When rumors of the affair first broke Young was so loyal to Edwards that he pretended that he was the father of Hunter’s daughter Frances Quinn, now 2. But part of Young’s disillusionment with the 2004 vice presidential candidate and 2008 candidate came one day as he went through a stack of DVDs at Rielle Hunter’s house.

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Female Toads Inflate to Avoid Sex

ToadSexBBC News reports:

When it comes to choosing a mate, female toads may have more control than previously thought, say scientists. A report in the Royal Society’s Biology Letters journal describes how a female cane toad inflates its body to prevent an amorous male from mating with it.

This makes it difficult for the male toad to “hold on”.

Male toads often wrestle with each other in an effort to grasp a mate. By inflating, a female can influence the outcome of such a competition.

It is assumed that frogs and toads evolved the ability to inflate their bodies with air as a defence against predators. The team of scientists, from Australia and the Netherlands, described in their report how this deters predators “by increasing the apparent size of the [frog or toad] and by rendering it too large to ingest”.

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