After reading this, I am seriously considering becoming a cannibismancer. However, you will need to send me a bud to get a reading.
via The Kernel
… Read the rest
There is an attitude in today’s world that rejects the mysticism of tarot readers and astrologers. It is fortunate, then, that there’s a new profession to bring forth your fortune from the mists of time. Her name is Jemima Packington, and she is the Asparamancer.
The Asparamancer lives a lonely life, for she is the only one of her kind and has no mentors or prodigies, nor established practices. But from the humble tips of asparagus, Jemima can see the future. Having complete faith in the wonders of the vegetable, I wrote to her and crossed her palm with journalistic promises. I asked to go to her, but this was rebuffed so as to preserve the sanctity of the Asparagus Grove, and instead I was requested to send some pictures of asparagus.