Tag Archives | Conspiracy Theory

The Conspiracy Theorist Glossary

300806jfkIf you’ve ever scoffed when someone told you that JFK’s second gunman destroyed the World Trade Center with assistance from reptilian extraterrestrials as part of a plan hatched at Bohemian Grove to corner the gold market before the return of Planet X, you’ve probably found yourself subject to a bevy of indicting catch phrases machine gunned at you so fast your head spun.

To help decode the buzzwords that form the conspiracy theorist lexicon, the Skeptic Project developed a handy glossary. Here are some highlights:

Awake: the opposite of “asleep.” Essentially, the condition of believing in conspiracy theories and not believing (supposedly) any government or “mainstream media” source. CT’ers employ numerous variations on the “asleep”/”awake” concept, such as “I woke up,” “You’re asleep,” “Why did you go back to sleep?”, “When I was asleep I believed…”, “We’re trying to wake people up!”, “A lot of people are waking up,” etc., etc.

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Ricin Mailer Believed He Was Exposing Illegal Organ Harvesting Conspiracy

ricin mailerMississippi man Kevin Curtis was arrested last week after mailing letters containing the deadly poison ricin to Barack Obama and Mississippi senator Roger Wicker. Buzzfeed reveals what may be the bizarre inspiration for the plot — it would seem that for years, the hospital janitor and Elvis impersonator has been attempting to wage war against a global organ-snatching conspiracy involving the highest levels of government:

[Curtis's] writings document “the actions of…a secret shadow government in which I feel have been put into place by higher powers to be in order to hide the truth behind the illegal organ harvesting market which I began investigating in 2000.”

Curtis  wrote on Facebook:

I’m on the hidden front lines of a secret war. A war that is making Billions of dollars for corrupt mafia related organizations and people. (bone, tissue, organ, body parts harvesting black market) when we lay our loved ones to rest….we hope and pray their bodies are not violated but I am here to tell you, as long as the bone, tissue & organ harvesting indu$try is NOT REGULATED….on any level(s) whether it be local, state, federal or national………..your loved ones body parts are NOT $AFE.

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The Universe Does Not Exist: Conspiratorial Cosmology – the Case Against the Universe

From Modern Mythology:

German physicists Jörg P. Rachen and Ute G. Gahlings have recently discovered evidence of a Universal Conspiracy and have just published their results in a brilliant exposé published in the highly esteemed Journal of Comparative Irrelevance:

Abstract: “Based on the cosmological results of the Planck Mission, we show that all parameters describing our Universe within the ΛCDM model can be constructed from a small set of numbers known from conspiracy theory. Our finding is confirmed by recent data from high energy particle physics. This clearly demonstrates that our Universe is a plot initiated an unknown interest group or lodge. We analyse possible scenarios for this conspiracy, and conclude that the belief in the existence of our Universe is an illusion, as previously assumed by ancient philosophers, 20th century science fiction authors and contemporary film makers.

 

 

It’s like this, only BIGGER

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28 Percent Of Americans Believe In Global New World Order Conspiracy

Belief in powerful shape-shifting lizards is also trending. Public Policy Polling has released the results of a telephone survey this past month of 1,247 registered voters which measured belief in various conspiracy theories. Findings include:

• 21% of voters say the US government covered up a UFO crash in Roswell, NM.
• 28% believe a secretive power elite with a globalist agenda is conspiring to eventually rule the world through an authoritarian world government, or New World Order, .
• 20% believe there is a link between vaccines and autism.
• 7% think the moon landing was faked.
• 13% think Barack Obama is the anti-Christ.
• 14% say the CIA was instrumental in creating the crack cocaine epidemic in America’s inner cities in the 1980’s.
• 4% say they believe “lizard people” control our societies.
• 51% say a larger conspiracy was at work in the JFK assassination.
• 5% believe that Paul McCartney actually died in 1966.

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Video Claims To Expose Obama’s Alien Shapeshifter Secret Service

How does Barack Obama get the job done day in and out? With help from the lizard people, as revealed by this footage from a public appearance this past year, to be taken with a very large grain of salt:
During Barack Obama's speech at the 2012 AIPAC policy conference at the Washington convention center, the camera spotted a very odd individual, who may be either with the U.S. Secret Service or with Israel's, and could be a strong evidence of a shapeshifter alien humanoid working for the powers that be.
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Half Of Russians Believe That The Chelyabinsk Meteor Strike Was Not A Meteor

Was the meteor flash of two weeks ago a UFO, divine miracle, or weapons test? Take your pick. The Christian Science Monitor reports:

A survey published today by the fairly staid Moscow daily Noviye Izvestia found that barely half its readers believe the official report that the blast a week ago in the Ural Mountains was caused by a meteor.

According to the newspaper, the other half prefer to believe in an assortment of bizarre explanations, including that the blast was a secret U.S. weapon test, an off-course ballistic missile, a message from God, or a crashing alien spaceship.

Russian ultranationalist parliamentarian Vladimir Zhirinovsky, has suggested that anti-Russian hardliners in the United States staged a secret weapons test over Russia. And the trade union newspaper Trud made the cheery suggestion that the meteorite could be carrying deadly viruses from outer space, possibly the work of malevolent extraterrestrial forces.

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Pope’s Retirement Linked To The Blackmailing Of A Circle Of Gay Vatican Officials, Reports Italian Press

I’m guessing the Vatican’s secret circle of gay cardinals are also superheroes. The Guardian reports:

A potentially explosive report has linked the resignation of Pope Benedict XVI to the discovery of a network of gay [high-ranking clergy] in the Vatican, some of whom were being blackmailed by outsiders. The pope’s spokesman declined to confirm or deny the report by the Italian daily newspaper La Repubblica.

The paper said the pope had decided on December 17th that he was going to resign – the day he received a dossier compiled on the so-called “Vatileaks” affair. Pope Benedict’s butler, Paolo Gabriele, was arrested and charged with having stolen and leaked papal correspondence.

A quotation said some Vatican officials had been subject to “external influence” from laymen with whom they had links of a “worldly nature” — a reference to blackmail. La Repubblica‘s report was the latest in a string of claims that a gay network exists in the Vatican.

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Did The Government Target Aaron Swartz Over His Role In Defeating SOPA?

Did U.S. authorities hound Reddit co-founder and internet freedom activist Aaron Swartz to his death due to his role in the defeat of the Stop Online Piracy Act, and his possible connections to WikiLeaks? Russia Today writes:

Aaron Swartz became a political target, and that is what led to his tragic death, believes web tycoon Kim Dotcom, the founder of the now-defunct file-storage site Megaupload. “There is no reasonable cause behind going after a young genius like him in the fashion they did,” says Dotcom.

Swartz’s death in suicide on January 11 has resonated in the media across the world. It became known that in 2011, US federal prosecutors charged Swartz with a series of counts under the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act, crimes that could have sent him away to prison for upwards of 35 years if convicted…

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False Past And The Phantom Time Hypothesis

Wikipedia lays out the phantom time hypothesis, the odd belief that certain eras of history did not occur:

The Phantom Time Hypothesis is a conspiracy theory developed by Heribert Illig in 1991. It proposes that periods of history, specifically that of Europe during the Early Middle Ages (AD 614–911), did not exist, and that there has been a systematic effort to cover up that fact. Illig believed that this was achieved through the alteration, misrepresentation and forgery of documentary and physical evidence.

The bases of Illig’s hypothesis include:

The scarcity of archaeological evidence that can be reliably dated to the period AD 614–911, on perceived inadequacies of radiometric and dendrochronological methods of dating this period.

The presence of Romanesque architecture in tenth-century Western Europe. This is taken as evidence that less than half a millennium could have passed since the fall of the Roman Empire, and concludes that the entire Carolingian period, including the person of Charlemagne, is a forgery by medieval chroniclers, more precisely a conspiracy instigated by Otto III and Gerbert d’Aurillac.

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Did NASA Delete Possible UFO Evidence From Its Archives?

Is NASA covering its tracks in regards to images that could reveal what is truly out there? Or simply reorganizing its archives of photos of space trash? io9 writes:

UFOlogists are freaking out today over the removal of several photos from a NASA archive. These photos [see right] have been used by various UFO groups to support their belief that aliens have been visiting Earth and governments are covering it up. NASA identifies these as images of “space debris.”

Believers say the removal of the photos is tantamount to admitting that NASA is trying to cover up extraterrestrial visitors. More likely is that they were removed after the space agency realized that they were fueling alien conspiracy theories.

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