Tag Archives | Florida

Florida Man Commits Suicide Over Obama’s Reelection

Is this becoming a trend? The Miami Herald reports:

A Key West man who told his partner that “if Barack gets re-elected, I’m not going to be around” was found dead on Nov. 8, with the words “F— Obama!” scrawled on his will and two empty prescription bottles nearby.

Henry Hamilton, 64, owner of Tropical Tan off Duval Street, was “very upset about the election results,” his partner Michael Cossey told Police Officer Anna Dykes. A friend of Hamilton had been worried about him and had a standing request to police to make welfare checks. Officer Pablo Rodriguez did just that and when he went to the condo, he woke up Cossey, prompting the discovery of Hamilton’s body in the bedroom.

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Monkey Captured After Two Years Of Eluding Authorities In Urban Florida

The monkey gave the forces of human society a good run for their money, remaining uncaught for two years. Over that time, it had a Facebook page and bit a random woman — in other words, it lived as a typical St. Petersburg resident. Via CBS Tampa:

The wild monkey that was on the lam in St. Petersburg for two years has finally been captured. Authorities say a wildlife official shot the monkey with a tranquilizer dart Wednesday.

The monkey eluded capture for years as it roamed neighborhoods in St. Petersburg. It even has a Facebook page and most recently bit a woman, causing trappers to ramp up their efforts to capture him.

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Giant Eyeball Washes Ashore On Florida Beach

The Orlando Sentinel reports on a monstrous find:

In Pompano Beach, Gino Covacci noticed a strange ball-like object at the high tide line. He kicked it over and found himself staring at the biggest eyeball he had ever seen. “It was very, very fresh,” he said Thursday. “It was still bleeding when I put it in the plastic bag.”

He notified a police officer, who gave him the phone number for the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission. It will be preserved in formalin, a mixture of formaldehyde and water, before being sent for analysis to the Florida Fish and Wildlife Research Institute in St. Petersburg, said Carli Segelson, spokeswoman for the wildlife commission.

No one could say immediately what species the giant eye came from. Charles Messing, a professor at Nova Southeastern University’s Oceanographic Center, said he couldn’t rule out a giant squid.

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Florida’s Governor Gives Out Phone Sex Hotline Number

If the Republicans win in the elections next month, it won’t be for lack of trying to lose by their currently elected officials. The latest official to sacrifice himself in a heroic attempt to lose votes is Republican Governor Rick Scott of Florida, reports Reuters:

In an embarrassing mistake, Florida Governor Rick Scott gave out a phone sex hotline number to Floridians seeking information on a deadly fungal meningitis outbreak.

Scott was providing an update on the outbreak at a cabinet meeting on Tuesday when he announced what he said was the hotline’s toll-free phone line, but gave out the wrong number.

The governor’s office was alerted by a public radio station in Tampa, WUSF, which was monitoring the cabinet meeting and posted the number on its website.

The station said it was “quickly notified by a reader that the number instead connected to an adult telephone line.”

Callers are greeted with the recording of a woman’s voice saying: “Hello boys, thank you for calling me on my anniversary.”…

[continues at Reuters]

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Florida Man Dies After Eating Dozens of Cockroaches in Pet Store Contest

Picture: Acrocynus (CC)

Via The Smoking Gun:

Thirty-two year old Floridian Edward Archbold died in the parking lot of a pet store this past Friday after consuming dozens of roaches in a contest to win a free python. The “Eat Bugs for Balls” contest offered the snake as a prize for the person who could consume the most discoid roaches in four minutes. Archbold is reported to have stated he didn’t feel well before regurgitating the roaches he had consumed. He collapsed moments later. The investigation is currently ongoing. Discoid roaches, also known as “False Death’s Head” roaches, are popular feeder animals for tarantulas and reptiles like bearded dragons. They can reach lengths of three inches.

If you’re still reading this (and still have the stomach for it) you can read more at The Smoking Gun.

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Found in Florida: Record-Breaking Burmese Python Pregnant with 87 Eggs

Picture: CGrapes429 (PD)

Via LiveScience:

Burmese pythons have settled into the Florida Everglades quite nicely, and it seems that they’re not going to be leaving any time soon. Thanks to irresponsible pet owners, the massive snakes have established a breeding population and are eating their way through native wildlife with merry abandon. Check out this worrisome discovery:

A double record-setting Burmese python has been found in the Florida Everglades. At 17 feet, 7 inches (5.3 me

ters) in length, it is the largest snake of its kind found in the state and it was carrying a record 87 eggs. Scientists say the finding highlights how dangerously comfortable the invasive species has become in its new home.

The snake was almost 165 pounds, easily big enough to kill a human being. Researchers say that they find several every day that they go into the Everglades. Think you’ll be python-free as long as you stay away from Florida?… Read the rest

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Former Chairman Of Florida Republican Party Testifies That Meetings Were Held On Black Voter Suppression

It may not be surprising, but it’s nice to hear stated under oath, particularly with Republicans at the moment attempting to roll out anti-voter legislation all across the country. Via the Tampa Bay Times:

In a wide-ranging deposition that spanned two days in late May, former Florida Republican Party chairman Jim Greer denounced some party officials as liars and “whack-a-do, right-wing crazies” as he described turmoil in the months before his resignation. Greer said some GOP leaders were meeting to discuss ways they could suppress black votes while others were constantly scheming against each other.

On voter suppression, Greer said he had just completed a December 2009 meeting with party general counsel Jason Gonzalez, political consultant Jim Rimes and Eric Eikenberg, Crist’s chief of staff, when questions arose about fundraising. “I was upset because the political consultants and staff were talking about voter suppression and keeping blacks from voting. It had been one of those days,” he said.

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Florida Accused Of Keeping Tuberculosis Outbreak Secret

All signs point to Florida being the most likely ground zero for a future zombie apocalypse. The Palm Beach Post reports:

The CDC officer had a serious warning for Florida health officials in April: A tuberculosis outbreak in Jacksonville was one of the worst his group had investigated in 20 years.

As health officials in Tallahassee turned their focus to restructuring, Dr. Robert Luo’s 25-page report describing Jacksonville’s outbreak — and the measures needed to contain it – went unseen by key decision makers around the state.

That report had been penned on April 5, exactly nine days after Florida Gov. Rick Scott signed the bill that shrank the Department of Health and required the closure of the A.G. Holley State Hospital in Lantana, where tough tuberculosis cases have been treated for more than 60 years.

Had they seen the letter, decision makers would have learned that 3,000 people in the past two years may have had close contact with contagious people at Jacksonville’s homeless shelters, an outpatient mental health clinic and area jails.

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Florida Police Kill Naked Man as He Chews on Another Man’s Face

Illustration: Jrewald2000 (CC)

Illustration: Jrewald2000 (CC)

Via CBS Miami:

Miami police are still tight-lipped about the man they shot and killed on the MacArthur Causeway Saturday afternoon, but new details back claims they had no choice: the naked man they shot was trying to chew the face off another naked man, and refused to obey police orders to stop his grisly meal, which one source now claims included his victim’s nose and eyeballs.

Surveillance video taken from security cameras at the nearby Miami Herald building show a police officer arrive on the scene, appear to be startled by the spectacle of two naked men lying on the street, and draw his service weapon. It appears that the officer shot one of the men, but it was difficult to tell in the video.

The bizarre shooting happened shortly after 2 p.m., when police responded to a 911 call about two naked men fighting on a bike path along the Causeway, which was packed with traffic on a busy holiday weekend…

Read More: CBS Miami

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TSA Places Baby On No-Fly List, Orders Family Off Airplane

Seriously? (And what's been going on with JetBlue flights lately?) Reports Ari Hait on WPBF 25 West Palm Beach:
Eighteen-month-old Riyanna has been called a lot of things: cute, adorable and now ... a suspected terrorist. She was called that on Tuesday night at the Ft Lauderdale Airport. She and her parents had just boarded a JetBlue flight when an airline employee approached them and asked them to get off the plane, saying representatives from the Transportation Security Administration wanted to speak to them. "And I said, 'For what?'" Riyanna's mother told only WPBF 25 News on Wednesday. "And he said, 'Well, it's not you or your husband. Your daughter was flagged as no fly.' I said, 'Excuse me?'" Riyanna's father was flabbergasted. "It's absurd," he said. "It made no sense. Why would an 18-month-old child be on a no-fly list?"
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