Tag Archives | Sex

Why I Joined the Good Men Project, Not the Good Person Project

Robert Couse-Baker (CC BY 2.0)

Robert Couse-Baker (CC BY 2.0)

Jed Diamond writes at at the Good Men Project:

When I first read Tom Matlack’s collection of stories about defining moments in men’s lives, I felt I was among kindred spirits. Tom found there was a connection between all the stories:

There was a moment when each man woke up, looking in the mirror and said, “I thought I knew what it meant to be a man. I thought I knew what it meant to be good. And I realize that I don’t know either.”

The only difference for me was that growing up I never had a clear sense of what it meant to be a man or what it meant to be a good man. My father was a writer and actor who became increasingly depressed when he couldn’t find meaningful work to support his family. When I was five years old he tried to commit suicide and spent the next seven years at Camarillo State Mental Hospital.

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Inside the Sex Cult of ‘Christ’

M.I. Nestel has written an extensive profile of the “self-professed holy man, Victor Arden Barnard,” over at The Daily Beast. Barnard was captured in Brazil on Friday after being on the run for about a year for allegedly having sex with girls as young as 12.

He claimed to be a Savior. But he turned on the teenage girls in his flock. And when they spoke up, he went on the lam.
“Christ in the flesh” has been captured. And now, his alleged victims and embittered kin are left to process the damage he’s wrought.

Self-professed holy man Victor Arden Barnard, 53, was busted in a beachside community in Brazil on Friday after almost a year on the run—and three months on the U.S. Marshals Service’s Most Wanted List. For years, according to court documents, Barnard had his way with several girls as young as 12, including a Brazilian exchange student, and also fornicated with church members’ wives back in his sect’s original compound based in Finlayson, Minnesota.

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The Solipsism of Evangelical Morality

Joel Penner (CC BY 2.0)

Joel Penner (CC BY 2.0)

Morgan Guyton writes at Patheos:

“Against you alone have I sinned.” These words from Psalm 51:4 are attributed to the Israelite king David speaking to God after he knocked up another man’s wife and had that man betrayed and murdered on the battlefield. Many evangelical pastors have praised this verse for how it names sin, but I consider it to be one of the most morally problematic verses in the Bible. It does do a very good job of encapsulating the solipsistic morality that I grew up with as an evangelical, in which sin had nothing to do with hurting other people and everything to do with whether or not I was displeasing God. Solipsism describes the delusion that I am the only person who actually exists in the universe. While I can’t blame anyone in particular for instilling me with this mindset, I grew up viewing morality as though the universe consisted of just God and me walking through a minefield of temptations, whether they were female bodies, drugs, or other objects.

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Creating love in the lab: The 36 questions that spark intimacy

zhouxuan12345678 (CC BY-SA 2.0)

zhouxuan12345678 (CC BY-SA 2.0)

Yasmin Anwar via Phys.org:

Around the time of the Summer of Love in 1967, Arthur Aron, then a UC Berkeley graduate student in psychology, kissed fellow student Elaine Spaulding in front of Dwinelle Hall. What they felt at that moment was so profound that they soon married and teamed up to investigate the mysteries of attraction and intimacy.

“I fell in love very intensely,” said Aron, a visiting scholar at UC Berkeley and research professor at Stony Brook University in New York. “Given that I was studying social psychology, just for fun I looked for the research on love, but there was almost none.”

So he took it on. In the nearly 50 years that Arthur and Elaine Aron have studied love, they have developed three dozen to create closeness in a lab setting. The result is not unlike the accelerated that can happen between strangers on an airplane or other close quarters.

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A Chat with Malcolm Brenner, Man Famous for Having Sex with a Dolphin

A few years back we published the anthology Everything You Know About Sex Is Wrong. One of the more challenging contributions was an interview with Clive Grace, an admitted zoophile. However, Grace’s bestial acts were confined to dogs and horses. Malcolm Brenner, on the other hand, went in for dolphins and tells Jezebel all about it:

Malcolm Brenner is the only man on Earth to achieve international fame for having sex with a dolphin. A former investigative journalist who covered the American Southwest, he remains best known for his 1970’s love affair—mostly romantic, briefly sexual—with a bottlenose dolphin named Dolly. Their “courtship,” which Brenner sees as dolphin-initiated and also transcendently romantic, took place in a theme park in Florida, the state where Brenner, now 63, currently lives. He chronicled these events in his autobiographical novel Wet Goddess, and Brenner’s story is the subject of a new short documentary called Dolphin Lover.

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The Revolution of Everyday Life: The Decline and Fall of Work

JD Hancock (CC BY 2.0)

JD Hancock (CC BY 2.0)

by Raoul Vaneigem at The Situationist International Text Library

The duty to produce alienates the passion for creation. Productive labour is part and parcel of the technology of law and order. The working day grows shorter as the empire of conditioning extends.In an industrial society which confuses work and productivity, the necessity of producing has always been an enemy of the desire to create. What spark of humanity, of a possible creativity, can remain alive in a being dragged out of sleep at six every morning, jolted about in suburban trains, deafened by the racket of machinery, bleached and steamed by meaningless sounds and gestures, spun dry by statistical controls, and tossed out at the end of the day into the entrance halls of railway stations, those cathedrals of departure for the hell of weekdays and the nugatory paradise of weekends, where the crowd communes in weariness and boredom?

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Take Me to the Death Cafe

hans van den berg (CC BY 2.0)

hans van den berg (CC BY 2.0)

Sophie Elmhirst writing at Prospect Magazine:

In the middle of the graveyard in Vissoie, a small town in the Swiss mountain valley of Anniviers, stands a grey stone cross. For years, the cross was the focus of a local competition among the town’s teenagers. The brief was simple: turn up at midnight, sit by the cross, and whoever lasts the longest wins. By day, the task doesn’t seem too onerous. The graveyard is absurdly picturesque, perched on the side of a hill next to the church, the valley dropping away to a river, mountains on the far side rising up against a faultless blue sky. Even the graves are palatable: there’s no ornate Victoriana here, no ghoulishness or mawkish angels, no sentimental inscriptions; just a few rows of simple wooden crosses planted in the ground. (A rule was declared in the town that the dead should all be commemorated identically, to prevent wealth-displaying one-upmanship.)

Not long ago, Bernard Crettaz, an eminent Swiss sociologist who was born and raised in Vissoie, sat on a stone wall by the shared grave of his parents—Pierre and Genevieve—and recalled his year of competition.

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